[Illustration] [Illustration] “A little saint with a color more lightful than orange” CABBAGES AND KINGS by O. HENRY _Author of “The Four Million,” “The Voice of the City,” “The Trimmed Lamp,” “Strictly Business,” “Whirligigs,” Etc._ “The time has come,” the Walrus said, “To talk of many things; Of shoes and ships and sealing-wax, And cabbages and kings.” THE WALRUS AND THE CARPENTER Contents THE PROEM BY THE CARPENTER I. “FOX-IN-THE-MORNING” II. THE LOTUS AND THE BOTTLE III. SMITH IV. CAUGHT V. CUPID’S EXILE NUMBER TWO VI. THE PHONOGRAPH AND THE GRAFT VII. MONEY MAZE VIII. THE ADMIRAL IX. THE FLAG PARAMOUNT X. THE SHAMROCK AND THE PALM XI. THE REMNANTS OF THE CODE XII. SHOES XIII. SHIPS XIV. MASTERS OF ARTS XV. DICKY XVI. ROUGE ET NOIR XVII. TWO RECALLS XVIII. THE VITAGRAPHOSCOPE THE PROEM BY THE CARPENTER They will tell you in Anchuria, that President Miraflores, of that volatile republic, died by his own hand in the coast town of Coralio; that he had reached thus far in flight from the inconveniences of an imminent revolution; and that one hundred thousand dollars, government funds, which he carried with him in an American leather valise as a souvenir of his tempestuous administration, was never afterward recovered. For a _real_, a boy will show you his grave. It is back of the town near a little bridge that spans a mangrove swamp. A plain slab of wood stands at its head. Some one has burned upon the headstone with a hot iron this inscription: RAMON ANGEL DE LAS CRUZES Y MIRAFLORES PRESIDENTE DE LA REPUBLICA DE ANCHURIA QUE SEA SU JUEZ DIOS It is characteristic of this buoyant people that they pursue no man beyond the grave. “Let God be his judge!”—Even with the hundred thousand unfound, though greatly coveted, the hue and cry went no further than that. To the stranger or the guest the people of Coralio will relate the story of the tragic end of their former president; how he strove to escape from the country with the public funds and also with Doña Isabel Guilbert, the young American opera singer; and how, being apprehended by members of the opposing political party in Coralio, he shot himself through the head rather than give up the funds, and, in consequence, the Señorita Guilbert. They will relate further that Doña Isabel, her adventurous bark of fortune shoaled by the simultaneous loss of her distinguished admirer and the souvenir hundred thousand, dropped anchor on this stagnant coast, awaiting a rising tide.