* * * * * Never slap children on the face; Nature provides a more suitable place. * * * * * Close the saloon and save the boys; close the garage and save the girls. * * * * * Sign in dry goods store: “Our woolen underwear will tickle you to death.” * * * * * A Shorthorn Bull A man called for hair restorer at the drug store. The new clerk gave him something to apply. In the course of time the man returned with a complaint. He declared the stuff powerful enough for some purpose but not to grow hair. His head was as bald as ever but he was getting two big lumps like cocoanuts on the top. The clerk looked at the empty bottle and turned ghastly pale as he exclaimed “My Gawd, man, I’ve made a terrible mistake. I gave you bust developer.” * * * * * Gosh All Hemlocks! Listen my children and you shall hear Of the midnight ride of a bucket of beer; Up the street and down the line, I’ve got the bucket; who’s got the dime? * * * * * “What’s Sauce for the Goose” A colored woman and her husband were conversing together when the latter happened to express curiosity as to the meaning of the word “propaganda” which he was constantly running across in the newspapers. “Well,” said his wife, “ah is not sure, but ah thinks ah know what propaganda is. F’r instance, wif mah fust husband ah had one chile, and two wif mah second. You’re mah third husband an’ we hain’t got none at all. Now, I’m the propah goose, but you ain’t the propahganda.” _Whiz Bang Editorials_ “_The Bull is Mightier Than the Bullet_” Is the theater becoming immoral? The majority of critics claim it is. The WHIZ BANG disagrees on this point. We claim the motion picture development has stopped the sporadic growth of suggestive plays on the legitimate stage. The immoral, or at least suggestive plays made their first appearance in any large number twenty years ago. Witness “Three Weeks,” “Sappho,” “Du Barry,” and others, and still today you will find these plays in oblivion. Together with them, the women who starred in such plays are almost unheard of today. Most prominent among these is Olga Nethersole. She was an English governess in the ’80’s and startled London with her portrayals of “The Transgressor,” “Magda” and other productions of like character. Twenty years ago Miss Nethersole shocked two continents with her “Sappho Kiss.” She always maintained that playing the parts of these easy women would “make” her. Witness her interview of more than five years ago, in which she is quoted as having said: “People have not understood that I chose to play prostitutes because I have felt it my work to aid the world by showing the suffering in it. If I felt that I had not been chosen for this task I should never have given my life to it.