I want a Cave-man just for luck, I’ll not be any sissy’s “duck,” I’m no “honey” or any such truck-- Me for the Cave-man stuff! * * * * * The Profiteer By George D. Brewer When God made the buzzard, the toad and the snake; As well as the worm and the rat, He stirred what was left of the entrails and ends, In an air-tight asbestos vat. From this corrupt mass of intestines and muck He skimmed the most rancid, I hear, And took it away to a corner in hell And from it produced a food profiteer. * * * * * Explosion of Pedigreed Cat (With Apologies to Captain Billy’s “Explosion of Pedigreed Bull”) A Persian kitty, perfumed and fair, Strayed out through the kitchen door for air, When a Tom Cat, lean and lithe and strong And dirty and yellow came along. He sniffed at the perfumed Persian cat, As she strutted about with much eclat, And thinking a bit of time to pass, He whispered: “Kiddo, you sure have class.” “That’s fitting and proper,” was her reply As she arched the whiskers over her eye, “I’m ribboned, I sleep in a pillow of silk And daily they bathe me in certified milk.” “Yet we’re never contented with what we’ve got I try to be happy, but happy I’m not. And I should be joyful, I should, indeed, For I certainly am highly pedigreed.” “Cheer up,” said the Tom Cat, with a smile, “And trust your new found friend a while. You need to escape from your back yard fence; My dear, all you need is experience.” New joys of life he then unfurled, As he told her tales of the outside world, Suggesting at last, with a luring laugh, A trip for the two down the “Primrose Path.” The morning after the night before The “Cat Came Back” at the hour of four, The look in her innocent eyes had went But the smile on her face was the smile of content. And in the after days when children came To the Persian kitty of pedigreed fame, They weren’t Persian--they were black and tan, And she told them their pa was a traveling man. * * * * * Summer Idyl The dragon-flies are on the wing-- Oh, would some power command ’em To fly like any decent thing, Instead of traveling tandem! * * * * * Bomb, Bomb, Bomb We were bombed last night, we were bombed the night before And we’re gonna be bombed tonight as we were never bombed before; When we’re bombed, we’re as scared as we can be, They can bomb the whole damned army if they don’t bomb me! CHORUS They’re over us, they’re over us, One little cave for the four of us; Glory be to God there are no more of us Or they’d bomb the whole damned crew! * * * * * Wild Woman