The other day a returned soldier asked me for a job and as I always like to favor the “vets” I gave him the place. I told him that his duties on the farm would be to get up at 5 in the morning, milk the cows, feed the teams, clean out the barn, haul hay, plow the fields, shock the corn, chore around— “And is there any clay on your farm?” asked the young man. “Why, what has that to do with it?” I answered him. “Oh, I thought maybe I could put in my spare time making bricks.” * * * * * Mary Ann—The landlord’s here to boost the rent again! Hubby—That means you have no fur coat this year, my dear! Wife—Oh, I don’t know. I may be able to find a friend like the woman in the story, “The Tale of a Fur Coat,” and you bet I’ll not pawn it! * * * * * Full many a race is lost Ere even a step is run, And many a coward fails Ere even his work’s begun, Think big, and your deeds will grow, Think small, and you’ll fall behind, Think that you can, and you will, It’s all in the state of mind. * * * * * [Illustration: BATHING BEAUTIES!] Real photographs of the famous California Bathing Girls. Just the thing for your den. Size 3½×5½. Positively the best on the market. Assortment of 6 for 25 cents or 25 for $1.00. Send money order or stamps. Foreign money not accepted unless exchange is included. Egbert Brothers, Dept. W. B., 303 Buena Vista Street, LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA _Wholesale agents wanted everywhere in the U. S. Write for wholesale terms._ * * * * * _Pull the Shades Down, Mary Ann_ Pull the shades down, Mary Ann, Pull the shades down, Mary Ann, Last night in the pale moon light, I saw you, I saw you; You were combing your golden hair, It was hanging over a chair; If you want to keep a secret From your future man, Pull the shades down, Mary Ann. * * * * * +------------------------------- If you like our Farmyard / Capt. Billy’s Whiz Bang, Filosophy and Foolishness, / R.R.2, Robbinsdale, Minn. fill in this coupon. / Enclosed is money order (or / check) for subscription commencing $2.50 per / with .................. issue year. / MONTH / / Name ............................ / Street ........................... / City & State ...................... * * * * * _Everywhere!_ _WHIZ BANG is on sale at all leading hotels, news stands, on trains, 25 cents single copies, or may be ordered direct from the publisher at 30 cents single copies; two-fifty a year._ [Illustration]