HANK (_steps forward, drawls_). I think we must start in about three weeks from Monday, if all the signs come right. (_To_ MARY) You see the excursion don’t last only till then. MARY (_in surprise_). _We_ must start! What in the world does this mean? HANK. Wal, you see, Leafy and me, we’ve been a-writin’ back and forth sence the cap’n told me I’d better; an’ she’s agreed to hev me, an’ go an’ live down to Nantucket. Grandfather’s old, and my marm wants me to come home an’ settle down an’ see to things. She says she’s tired o’ housekeeping, and wants to see some young folks round. J. Q. A. (_To_ L. J.). ’Fore I’d marry a cook! Anybody that feels as big as you do. Cookie Mudgitt! How are you, Mrs. Cookie Mudgitt! CAPT. G. Hold your yorp! Hundreds of big men hev ben cooks. There was the most worshipful G. M. of aour Masonic Lodge, he used to be cook in Annisport Jail, an’ now he’s a ’surance man, an’ lives in a tarnal big haouse. An’, then, there was a feller cooked on a ranch five year’, an’ they sent him to Congress. MARY. Oh, Hank! what shall we do without you? HANK. I tho’t o’ that. But a nice French Creole feller is takin’ my place to-day; an’ if he does well, p’r’aps you’ll keep him. If not, I’ll find somebody else afore we go. MARY (_to_ L. J.). When are you going to be married? L. J. (_loftily_). As soon as we have made the needed preparations. Henry will explain. J. Q. A. (_to_ HANK). Then, that’s what you’re so rigged up for, ain’t it, Bub? in all them sailor slops. You look like a royal tar, a regular old Britisher. HANK (_sheepishly_). Why, yes; you see, Leafy, she likes it. But as soon as the weddin’ is over (she wants me to be married in ’em here on the boat), I mean to put the whole rig away in my sea-chist, with them blasted books that deluded me into goin’ to sea; an’ that will be the last of my bein’ a sailor. I’ve had enough of it. Darn the bunks! I want to sleep on a first-rate feather-bed the rest of my life. L. J. Law! Henry. How you do talk! HANK. It’s a fact, Leafy, so there! (_He goes up to her and tries to kiss her._) L. J. (_pushing him away_). There! that will do, Henry. That’s seven times to-day since I came. HANK. Is it? Well, ’tain’t any too many, anyhow! J. Q. A. You great galloot! Catch me ever being such a fool. Say! what kind of a necktie you going to wear? HANK. Oh, a stunner! blue and yallar, I guess. (_Looks at_ L. J.) Sha’n’t I, Leafy? L. J. (_with dignity_). No, Henry; you must have one to match my dress. J. Q. A. (_to_ L. J.). ’Fore I’d go taggin’ way down to New Orleans after a husband! L. J. You’ll have to tag all round the world before you’ll find any one fool enough to wed _you_. J. Q. A. I don’t think I shall ever “wed.” My affections have been blighted by a fair damsel from Chicago. She had large feet. MRS. G. Stop, John Quincy! Yer as sarsy daown here as yer was ter hum; ain’t ye l’arnt nothin’ by travellin’?