England -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Short stories, English
He stood confused, while a stout fair man smote his back up and down
with a large flat hand. Whited sepulchre! A bubble of rage rose to
his lips. All right! She should see! He felt for the girl’s card, and
was suddenly amazed to find that he had no need to look at it--he
remembered the address! Not far off, on the other side of the Euston
Road! That was funny--had he been looking at it without realising? They
said you had a subconscious mind. Well, what about it? No, it was his
conscious mind that was going to serve Alice out! He had reached the
Euston Road. Crossing it, he began to feel a queer pleasurable weakness
in the legs. By this he knew that he was going to do wrong. He was
not going to visit the girl just to serve his wife out, but because
the prospect was----! That was bad--bad; it would put Alice in the
right! He stood still at the corner of a narrow square, with a strip of
garden, and railings round it. He leaned against those railings, his
eyes searching the trees. He had always been quite straight with his
wife--it was she who had put the idea into his head. And yet his legs
being pleasurably weak seemed in an odd way to excuse her. It was like
his doubt whether they hadn’t to do something about it at the police
court. Barring Alice--barring the police court--where would he--would
any man be? Without virtue, entirely without virtue. A pigeon in the
garden cooed. “Any time you’re passing, I’ll be glad to see you.” It
had sounded genuine--really grateful. And the girl had looked--not
worse than anybody else! If Alice had been sympathetic about it he
would never have thought of her again; that is--well----! The doubt
set his legs in motion. He was a married man, and that was all about
it! But he looked across at the numbers on the houses. Twenty-seven!
Yes, there it was! A bloom of lilac brushed his face. The scent jerked
him suddenly back to the farm in Somerset, and he and Alice courting.
Alice--not the Alice on the landing! He scrutinised the shabby house,
and suddenly went hot all over. Suppose he went in there--what would
that girl think? That he had paid her fine because----! But that wasn’t
it at all--oh! no--he wasn’t a squirt like that! He turned his face
away, and walked on fast and far.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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