England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
While Oswald went about the streets so lightly, and thought so
pleasantly of his prospects, another mind, still more agitated than that
of Cara, was turning over and over all he had done for the last five or
six weeks, and all that he might be about to do in the future. Agnes in
her convent, with all her routine of duties--with the little tinkling
bell continually calling her to one thing or another, to matins or
evensong, to ‘meditation,’ to this service or that, to choir practice,
to dinner and tea and recreation--carried a tumult of fancies about with
her, which no one, except perhaps Sister Mary Jane, guessed. Oswald
would have stood aghast could he have seen into that little ocean of
excited feeling, where the waves rose higher and higher as the hours
went on, and sometimes a swelling tide almost swept the thinker herself
away--though indeed he would have been so unable to understand it that
the inspection would probably have taught him little. How easily he took
all this, which was so tremendous to her! and that not only because of
the difference between man and woman, but because of the fundamental
difference in temperament, which was greater still. Agnes had known but
little that was lovely or pleasant in her life. Her rectory-home was
neither; her father and mother and brothers and sisters were all vulgar
and commonplace, struggling for existence, and for such privileges as it
contained, one against another, and against the world, each grumbling at
the indulgences the other managed to secure. The parish and its
poor--and its rich, who were not much more attractive--had been all the
world she had known; and the only beings who had crossed her horizon,
who were not struggling like her own people, in the sordid race of
existence, to get something, whatever it might be, were the Sisters in
the House, and such a gentle retired person as Miss Cherry, who was not
fighting for anything, who was ready to yield to anyone, and whose mild
existence was evidently not pervaded by that constant recollection of
self which filled up all the life of the others. This was what had
brought the visionary girl into the House, which was sordid, too, in its
details, though not in its spirit. Then there had been suddenly
presented to her, just as she settled down to the work of the House, an
image of something new, something more spontaneous, more easy in
generosity, more noble in liberality than anything she had ever
encountered. What did it matter that this type of nobleness was a
handsome young man? Visionary Agnes, in the daring of her youth, saw no
harm, but rather a beautiful fitness, in the fact that this revelation
of the ideal should have all that was best in external as well as in
more important things. He had stopped short--no doubt with all the
brilliant world, which she did not know, waiting for him, arrested till
he should rejoin it--to carry the wounded child to the hospital. He had
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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