England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
Her husband reminded her of the common idea that all the scenes of your
life came before you, as in a panorama, when you were drowning. ‘I
should not like that,’ she said, with a shiver. Then Abbondio
interposed, he to whom the boat belonged which the Beresfords hired, and
told how he had been drowned once.
‘They brought me back,’ he said; ‘and I shall have to die twice now,
which is hard upon a man; for I was gone; if they had not brought me
back, I should never have known anything more. No, Signora, I did not
see all that had happened in my life. I felt only that I had slipped the
net, and was grasping and grasping at it, and could not get it.’
‘That was painful,’ she said, eagerly.
‘It was a confusion,’ said the fisherman.
Mrs. Beresford called to her husband to give him some money for the poor
widows who had lost their men in the boat. ‘A confusion!’ she said to
herself, dreamily. It was a very still day after the storm, and she had
been looking with a strange wistfulness at the soft blue ripples of the
water which had drowned these men. ‘A confusion! How strange it is that
we know so little about dying! A lingering death would be good for that,
that you could write it down hour by hour that others might know.’
‘One would not be able,’ said her husband; ‘besides, I think everything
gets misty; and one ceases to be interested about other people. I don’t
much believe those stories that represent passionate feeling in the
dying. The soul gets languid. Did I ever tell you what a friend of mine
said who was dead like Abbondio till the doctors got hold of her and
forced her back?’
‘No,’ she said, growing very pale; ‘tell me, James.’
‘She told me that she felt nothing that was painful, but as if she was
floating away on the sea somewhere about Capri, where she had once been.
Do you remember the sea there, how blue it is about those great
Faraglioni rocks? And there she was floating--floating--not suffering;
mind and body, all softly afloat; until they got hold of her, as I say,
and forced her back.’
‘Ah!’ said Mrs. Beresford, with a shiver; ‘I should not like to be
forced back. Poor soul! She will have to die once again some time; but
if it was only like that, she will not be much afraid.’
‘She was as far gone as she could go, to come back, I have heard. What
queer talk this is, my darling! The accident has spoiled all our
pleasure.’
‘No; it is pleasant talk. I like that idea of floating; it is better,
far better, than Abbondio’s confusion; but that, I suppose, was because
of the suddenness in his case, and clutching at something perhaps as he
got into the water. It was not an accident with her, was it? She was
dying of an illness as we poor women do.’
‘And most men, Annie; the greater part of us all.’
‘Yes, yes; I know. Poor woman! And they brought her back?’
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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