Castes and Tribes of Southern India. Vol. 5 of 7Thurston, Edgar
History
Castes and Tribes of Southern India. Vol. 5 of 7
Thurston, Edgar
Caste -- India, South; Ethnology -- India, South; India, South -- Social life and customs; Tribes -- India, South
In connection with the following note by Mr. C. P. Raman Menon on
sambandham among the Akattu Charna or Akathithaparisha (inside clan),
Mr. Fawcett states that "my informant says in the first place that
the man should not enter into sambandham with a woman until he is
thirty. Now-a-days, when change is running wild, the man is often
much less. In North Malabar, which is much more conservative than
the south, it was, however, my experience that sambandham was rare on
the side of the man before twenty-seven." "The Karanavan," Mr. Raman
Menon writes, "and the women of his household choose the bride,
and communicate their choice to the intending bridegroom through a
third party; they may not, dare not speak personally to him in the
matter. He approves. The bride's people are informally consulted,
and, if they agree, the astrologer is sent for, and examines the
horoscopes of both parties to the intended union. As a matter of
course these are found to agree, and the astrologer fixes a day
for the sambandham ceremony. A few days before this takes place,
two or three women of the bridegroom's house visit the bride,
intimating beforehand that they are coming. There they are well
treated with food and sweetmeats, and, when on the point of leaving,
they inform the senior female that the bridegroom (naming him) wishes
to have sambandham with ... (naming her), and such and such a day is
auspicious for the ceremony. The proposal is accepted with pleasure,
and the party from the bridegroom's house returns home. Preparations
for feasting are made in the house of the bride, as well as in that
of the bridegroom on the appointed day. To the former all relations
are invited for the evening, and to the latter a few friends who are
much of the same age as the bridegroom are invited to partake of food
at 7 or 8 P.M., and accompany him to the bride's house. After eating
they escort him, servants carrying betel leaves (one or two hundred
according to the means of the taravad), areca nuts and tobacco, to
be given to the bride's household, and which are distributed to the
guests. When the bride's house is far away, the bridegroom makes his
procession thither from a neighbouring house. Arrived at the bride's
house, they sit awhile, and are again served with food, after which
they are conducted to a room, where betel and other chewing stuff
is placed on brass or silver plates called thalam. The chewing over,
sweetmeats are served, and then all go to the bridal chamber, where
the women of the house and others are assembled with the bride, who,
overcome with shyness, hides herself behind the others. Here again
the bridegroom and his party go through more chewing, while they chat
with the women. After a while the men withdraw, wishing the couple
all happiness, and then the women, departing one by one, leave the
couple alone, one of them shutting the door from the outside. The
Pattar Brahmans always collect on these occasions, and receive small
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