'Ellen Gibbs, so that is her name,' thought Mildred. There was a note
of authority in the letter which did not escape Mildred's notice and
which she easily translated into a note of animosity, if not of
hatred. Mildred did not like meeting this woman, something told her
that it would be wiser not, but she wanted to see Ralph, and an
expression of vindictiveness came into her cunning eyes. 'If she dares
to try to oppose me, she'll soon find out her mistake. I'll very soon
settle her, a common woman like that. Moreover she has been his
mistress, I have not, she will quail before me, I shall have no
difficulty in getting the best of her.'
'To-morrow. This letter was written last night, so I have to go to see
him to-day, this afternoon, three o'clock, I shall have to go up after
lunch by the two o'clock train. That will get me there by three.... I
wonder if he is really dying? If I were to go and see him and he were
to recover it would be like beginning it over again.... But I don't
know why every base thought and calculation enter my head. I don't
know why such thoughts should come into my head, I don't know why they
do come, I don't call them nor do their promptings affect me. I am
going to see him because I was once very fond of him, because I caused
him, through no fault of mine, a great deal of suffering--because it
appears that he's dying for love of me. I know he'd like to see me
before he dies, that's why I am going, and yet horrid thoughts will
come into my head; to hear me thinking, any one would imagine it was
only on account of my own vanity that I wanted to see him, whereas it
is quite the contrary. As a rule I hate sick people, and I'm sure it
is most disagreeable to me to meet that woman.'
The two o'clock train took her to town, a hansom from Victoria to the
studio; she dismissed the hansom at the corner and walked up the
street thinking of the woman who would open the door to her. There was
something about the woman she didn't like. But it didn't matter; she
would be shown in at once, and of course left alone with Ralph...
Supposing the woman were to sit there all the while. But it was too
late now, she had knocked.
'I've come to see Mr. Hoskin.' Feeling that her speech was too abrupt
she added, 'I hope he is better to-day.'
'Yes, I'm thankful to say he's a little better.'
Mildred stopped in the passage, and Ellen said:
'Mr. Hoskin isn't in his bedroom. We've put him into the studio.'
'I hope she doesn't think that I've been in his bedroom,' thought
Mildred. Ralph lay in a small iron bed, hardly more than a foot from
the floor, and his large features, wasted by illness, seemed larger
than ever. But a glow appeared in his dying eyes at the sight of
Mildred. Ellen placed a chair by his bedside and said:
'I will go out for a short walk. I shan't be away more than half an
hour.'
Their eyes said, 'We shall be alone for half an hour,' and she took
the thin hand he extended to her.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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