'Charge It': Keeping Up With HarryBacheller, Irving
General
'Charge It': Keeping Up With Harry
Bacheller, Irving
Didactic fiction; Humorous stories
"'At last those books have a chance to do some little good in the
world, and I don't want them to lose it,' I urged. 'The hands,
feet, and legs of the high and low born are slowly being deprived of
their rights in this community. Pride is robbing them of their
ancient and proper offices. How many of the young men and women of
our acquaintance would be seen on the street with a package in their
hands, to say nothing of a wheelbarrow? Their souls are above it!'
"'Why should they carry packages and roll wheelbarrows?' Harry asked.
'Stores deliver goods these days.'
"'That's one reason why it costs so much to live. We have to pay for
our pride and our indolence and the delivery of the goods. It's all
charged in the bill. Some member of the family used to go to market
every morning with his basket and carry the goods home with him.'
"'It would be ridiculous for me to do that,' said Harry. 'We're able
to pay the bills.'
"'But you're doing a great injustice to those who are not. You make
the delivery system a necessary thing, and those who can't afford it
have to help you stand the expense--a gross injustice. I want you to
help me in this cause of the hand and foot. Your example would be full
of inspiration. Excuse me a moment.'
"I went for the wheelbarrow and rolled it up to the front door. Then
we brought out the books and loaded them. That done, I seized the
handles of the barrow.
"'Come on,' I said. 'I'll do the work--you share the disgrace with
me.'
"My gray hairs were too much for him.
"'No; give me the handles,' he insisted. 'If it won't hurt you, it
won't hurt me--that's sure.'
"So, in his silk hat and frock-coat and spats, with a carnation in his
buttonhole, he seized the wheelbarrow like a man, and away we went. I
steered him up the Main Street, and people began to hail us with
laughter from automobiles, and to jest with us on the sidewalk, and
Marie came along with two other pretty girls, and the barrow halted in
a gale of merriment.
"'What in the world are you doing?' one of them asked.
"'It's the remains of the late Mr. Smollett,' I explained.
"'I'm setting an example to the young,' said Harry, as he mopped his
forehead. 'Couldn't help it. I had to do this thing.'
"'Great!' Marie exclaimed. 'Simply great! I'm going to get me a
wheelbarrow.'
"She would take hold of the handles and try it, and went on half a
block in spite of our protests, creating much excitement.
"That was the first rude beginning of The Basket and Wheelbarrow
Brigade in Pointview, of which I shall tell you later. And now I shall
explain my generosity--it can generally be explained--and how I came
by the Smollett."
VI
IN WHICH BETSEY COMMITS AN INDISCRETION
"Christmas was approaching, and Betsey said to me one day that she had
been guilty of a great extravagance.
"'I know you will forgive me just this once,' she went on. 'My love
for you is so extravagant that I had to keep pace with it. You've
simply got to accept something very grand.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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