I had my health, sure, but I finally figured out why. If you believe any of this, you're thinking that the Hexers must have laid off me, which is why I'm healthy. I thought so too, but how would that add up? Look, I tried every way I could to raise eighteen seventy-five to buy a government bond. I never made it I never made it because I wasn't _allowed_ to. But I didn't know it because I'd been euchred into the Foundation for the Treatment of Hagle's Disease. Hundreds of thousands of dollars, all earmarked for one purpose only--treating my disease--and I haven't got any! Or maybe you're figuring the way I did, that senility is a disease, and all I have to do is wait for it to creep up on me so I can get some of that Foundation money. But the Hexers have that fixed too, I'll bet. I'm not sure, but I think I'm going to live for centuries without a sick day in my life. In other words, I'm going to live that life out as poor as I am right now! It's a fantastic story, Doctor, but you believe me, don't you? You _do_ believe every word of it. You _have_ to, Doctor! Because a persecution complex is kind of a disease and I'd have to be treated for it. Now will you let me out of this jacket so I can smoke a cigarette? End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Charity Case, by Jim Harmon