Produced by Larry B. Harrison and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net CHILD _vs._ PARENT THE MACMILLAN COMPANY NEW YORK · BOSTON · CHICAGO · DALLAS ATLANTA · SAN FRANCISCO MACMILLAN & CO., LIMITED LONDON · BOMBAY · CALCUTTA MELBOURNE THE MACMILLAN CO. OF CANADA, LTD. TORONTO CHILD VERSUS PARENT _Some Chapters on the Irrepressible Conflict in the Home_ BY STEPHEN S. WISE RABBI OF THE FREE SYNAGOGUE Author of "The Ethics of Ibn Gabirol," "How to Face Life," "Free Synagogue Pulpit," etc. New York THE MACMILLAN COMPANY 1922 _All rights reserved_ PRINTED IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA. COPYRIGHT, 1922, BY THE MACMILLAN COMPANY. Set up and electrotyped. Published March, 1922. BROWN BROTHERS, LINOTYPERS NEW YORK TO THE MEMORY OF MY MOTHER, SABINE DE FISCHER WISE CONTENTS CHAPTER PAGE I. FACING THE PROBLEM 1 II. BACK OF ALL CONFLICTS 11 III. SOME PARENTAL RESPONSIBILITIES UNMET 19 IV. THE ART OF PARENTAL GIVING 30 V. THE OBLIGATION OF BEING 41 VI. WARS THAT ARE NOT WARS 53 VII. CONFLICTS IRREPRESSIBLE 62 VIII. CONFLICTING STANDARDS 69 IX. THE DEMOCRATIC REGIME IN THE HOME 76 X. REVERENCE THY SON AND THY DAUGHTER 84 XI. THE OBSESSION OF POSSESSION 94 XII. PARENTS AND VICE-PARENTS 104 XIII. WHAT OF THE JEWISH HOME? 113 XIV. THE JEWISH HOME TODAY 120 XV. THE SOVEREIGN GRACES OF THE HOME 127 CHAPTER I FACING THE PROBLEM One way of averting what I have called the irrepressible conflict is to insist that, in view of the fundamental change of attitude toward the whole problem, the family is doomed. Even if the family were doomed, some time would elapse before its doom would utterly have overtaken the home. In truth, the family is not doomed quite yet, though certain views with respect to the family are,--and long ought to have been,--extinct. Canon Barnett[A] was nearer the truth when he declared: "Family life, it may be said, is not 'going out' any more than nationalities are going out; both are 'going on' to a higher level." To urge that the problem of parental-filial contact need not longer be considered, seeing that the family is on the verge of dissolution, is almost as simple as the proposal of the seven-year-old colored boy in the children's court, in answer to the kindly inquiry of the Judge: "You have heard what your parents have to say about you. Now, what can you say for yourself?" "Mistah Judge, I'se only got dis here to say: I'd be all right if I jes had another set of parents."