Children's Ways: Being selections from the author's "Studies of childhood," with some additional matterSully, James
Science
Children's Ways: Being selections from the author's "Studies of childhood," with some additional matter
Sully, James
Child development; Child psychology
As soon as our authority begins to assert itself in the issuing of
commands the child's disposition to disobey, that is to have his way
rather than ours, is apt to show itself now and again in decided
refusals. When, let us say, the nurse gives up pulling him from the
dirty pool, and bids him come away, he may very likely assert himself in
an eloquent, "I won't," or less bluntly, "I can't come yet".
Here, of course, there may be no wilful rejection of recognised law, but
merely resistance to this particular disagreeable order coming from this
particular person. Nevertheless we must, I fear, admit that such
refusals to obey orders have in them something of true lawlessness. The
whole attitude of the child when he thus "tries on" defiance of commands
is certainly suggestive of the rebel's temper. Nobody is so completely
reckless as the child-rebel. When the fit is on him he pays not the
least attention to the most awful of warnings. One little offender of
four when he was reminded by his sister--two years older--that he would
be shut out from heaven retorted impiously, "I don't care"; adding, for
reasons best known to himself, "uncle won't go--I'll stay with him".
_Evading the Law._
In addition to this first impressive form of opposition there are later
ones which plainly show the spirit of antagonism. The conflict with law
now takes on the aspect of evasion or "trying it on".
One of the simplest of these childish tricks is the invention of an
excuse for not instantly obeying a command, as "Come here!" "Don't tease
pussy!" A child soon finds out that to say "I won't" when he is bidden
to do something is indiscreet as well as vulgar. He wants to have his
own way without resorting to a gross breach of good manners, so he
replies insinuatingly, "I's very sorry, but I's too busy," or in some
such conciliatory words. This field of invention offers a fine
opportunity for the imaginative child. A small boy of three years and
nine months on receiving from his nurse the familiar order, "Come here!"
at once replied, "I can't, nurse, I's looking for a flea," and pretended
to be much engrossed in the momentous business of hunting for this
quarry in the blanket of his cot. The little trickster is such a lover
of fun that he is pretty certain to betray his ruse in a case like this,
and our small flea-catcher, we are told, laughed mischievously as he
proffered his excuse. Such sly fabrications may be just as naughty as
the uninspired excuses of a stupidly sulky child, but it is hard to be
quite as much put out by them.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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