Children's Ways: Being selections from the author's "Studies of childhood," with some additional matterSully, James
Science
Children's Ways: Being selections from the author's "Studies of childhood," with some additional matter
Sully, James
Child development; Child psychology
It is a further refinement when the staunch little lover of liberty sets
about "easing" the pressure of commands. If, for example, he is told to
keep perfectly quiet because mother or father wants to sleep, he will
prettily plead for the reservation of whispering ever so softly. If he
is forbidden to ask for things at the table he will resort to sly
indirect reminders of what he wants, as when a boy of five and a half
years whispered audibly: "I hope somebody will offer me some more soup,"
or when a girl of three and a half years, with more subtle insinuation,
observed on seeing the elder folk eating cake: "I not asking".
A like astuteness will show itself in meeting the dismal accusations and
scoldings. Sometimes the fault-finding is daringly ignored, and the
small culprit, after keeping up an excellent appearance of listening,
proceeds in the most artless way to talk about something more agreeable,
or, what is worse, to criticise the manner of his correction; as when a
small boy interrupted his mother's well-prepared homily by remarking:
"Mamma, when you talk you don't move your upper jaw".
In cases in which no attempt is made to ignore the accusation, the small
wits are wont to be busy discovering exculpations. Here we have the
ruses, often crude enough, by which the little culprit tries to shake
off moral responsibility, to deny the authorship of the "naughty"
action. The blame is put on anybody or anything--if there is no other
scape-goat in view, then on the hands or other "bodily agents". This
last device is sometimes hit upon very early, as when a mite of two who
was told to stop crying gasped out: "Elsie cry--_not_ Elsie cry--tears
cry--naughty tears!" We find too at an early age a suggestion of
fatalism, as when a boy of three who was blamed for not eating his
crusts, and his procedure contrasted with that of his virtuous sire,
remarked: "Yes, but, papa, you see God had made you and me different".
Next to these denials of the "naughty" action come attempts at
justification. Sometimes these look like pitiful examples of quibbling.
A boy had been rough with his baby brother. His mother chid him, telling
him he might hurt baby. He then asked his mother, "Isn't he my own
brother?" and on his mother admitting so incontestable a proposition,
exclaimed triumphantly, "Well, you said I could do what I liked with _my
own_ things". At other times they have a dreadful look of being fibs
invented for the purpose of covering a fault. Under a severe mode of
discipline a child is apt, as already hinted, to slip over the boundary
line of truth in his self-protective efforts to escape blame and
punishment.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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