"He did. I first heard it through Miss Bennett, your _protégée,_ who
has come back, and is now a governess at Mrs. Brereton's. But when I
questioned Sir Edwin himself, he did not deny it."
"You questioned him?"
"Certainly. I felt it to be my duty. He says that he knew you in your
father's lifetime; that he was intimate with you both: that you and he
used to sing duets together; in short, that--"
"Go on. I wish to hear it all."
"That is all. And I am sure, Mrs. Grey, it is enough."
"It is enough. And he has been saying this, and you have been listening
to it, perhaps repeating it to all Avonsbridge. What a wicked woman you
must be!"
The words were said, not fiercely or resentfully, but in a sort of
meditative, passive despair. A sense of the wickedness, the cruelty
there was in the world, the hopelessness of struggling against it, of
disentangling fact from falsehood, of silencing malice and disarming
envy, came upon Christian in a fit of bitterness uncontrollable. She
felt as if she could cry out, like David, "The waters have overwhelmed
me, the deep waters have gone over my soul."
Even if she were not blameless--who is blameless in this mortal
Life?--even if she had made a mistake--a great mistake--her punishment
was sharp. Just now, when happiness was dawning upon her, when the
remorse for her hasty marriage and lack of love toward her husband had
died away, when her heart was beginning to leap at the sound of his
step, and her whole soul to sun itself in the tender light of his loving
eyes, it was very, very hard!
"Well, Mrs. Grey, and what have you to say for yourself?"
Christian looked up instinctively--lifted her passive hands, and folded
them on her lap, but answered nothing.
"You must see," continued Miss Gascoigne, "what an exceedingly
unpleasant story it is, and how necessary it was for me to speak
about it. Such a matter easily might become the whole town's talk.
An acquaintance before your marriage, which you kept so scrupulously
concealed that your nearest connections--I myself even--had not the
slightest idea of it. You must perceive, Mrs. Grey, what conclusions
people will draw--indeed, can not help drawing. Not that I believe--I
assure you I don't--one word against you. Only confide in me, and I will
make the matter clear to all Avonsbridge. You hear me?"
"Yes"
"And now, my dear"--the energy of her protection making Aunt Henrietta
actually affectionate--"do speak out. Tell me all you have to say for
yourself."
"Nothing."
"Nothing? What do you mean?"
It may seem an odd thing to assert, and a more difficult thing still to
prove, but Miss Gascoigne was not at heart a bad woman. She had a
fierce temper and an enormous egotism, yet these two qualities, in the
strangely composite characters that one meets with in life, are not
incompatible with many good qualities.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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