Oh measure the brief philological span Of the high-pressure words of the lovely young man!-- "B' Jauve! you daun't sayh saw! youah playing it low! Aw, auyn't she a daisy! I knaw her, y' knaw. She's thweet on me, somehow, though why I dawn't say, It cawn't be my beauty, it must be my _way_! Did you notith, laust night, Chawley Johnson's neck-tie? It paralyzed me, and I thought I should d-i-e! He's quite a sound fellaw to talk to awhile; It's weally a pity he isn't our style!" And thus talks forever, with slight interlude, The creature that lately was christened a ----. Oh boys! there are several hundreds of ways To make yourselves small to the average gaze; Of which some will cost you considerably less, Accomplishing nearly an equal success. Go purchase a gilded hand-organ some day, And stand on the corner and solemnly play; Envelop yourselves in the skin of an ape, Assuming his methods as well, as his shape; Submit to refined zoological charms, And carry a lap-dog about in your arms; But _don't_ let Destruction upon you intrude. So far as to make you down into a ----. * * * * * I think I saw, a minute's half or less, The young girl who composed this spiteful mess; She watched me pick it up, made a half rush Toward me, and then retreated with a blush. I called, before she vanished from my vision, "My dear, I think you've lost your composition!" But she dodged off, as if she seemed to doubt it, And, I suppose, went on to school without it. * * * * * Pacing the question over, far and near, I think the little maid was too severe. Sweet Charity can roof much sin, they tell, Why shouldn't it shelter foolishness as well? When we draw rein and look about a minute, We see no field but God is somewhere in it; He made the eagle and the lion, I've heard; Why not the monkey and the chipping-bird? * * * * * [_From Arthur Selwyn's Note-book._] Pavement and window and wall What is the cost of you all? Parlor and boudoir and stair, Crowded with furniture rare; Gems from the mountains and seas, Spires that out-measure the trees; Chamber and palace and hall-- What is the price of you all? [_Voices._] What did we cost? Bend ear; What did we cost? Now hear.