French fiction -- Translations into English; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; Young men -- Fiction
And she took two or three steps, as if to see the better. Then, she
stood still in the middle of the chamber, alone.
As for me, I yet held the corpse in my arms, I covered myself with it, I
protected myself against Laurence who was approaching.
"Do not advance," cried I to her, harshly, "do not come here to soil
this child who is sleeping. Remain where you are. I have to judge and
condemn you."
"Claude," she answered, in a meek voice, "let me kiss her."
"No, no, your lips are all bruised with Jacques' kisses. You would
profane the dead."
Jacques seemed to be asleep, his head in the sheet. Laurence fell upon
her knees.
"Listen, Claude," she said, stretching out her hands towards me: "I know
not what you see upon my lips, but do not speak to me with such
harshness. I have need of gentleness."
I stared at this woman, who was humbly complaining, and I failed to
recognize Laurence. I clasped Marie closer, fearing some weakness.
"Arise and listen to me," I cried out to Laurence: "I wish to make an
end of this. You come from Jacques' room. You should not have come here.
You opened the wrong door."
Laurence arose.
"Then, it is your intention to drive me away, is it?" asked she.
"It is not I who drive you away. You have driven yourself away by
accepting another asylum. Remain in that asylum."
"I have not chosen another asylum. You are deceived, Claude. There are
no strange kisses upon my lips. I love you."
She advanced timidly, fascinating, her arms outstretched.
"Do not approach, do not approach," I cried again, with a movement of
fright. "I do not wish you to touch me, I do not wish you to touch
Marie. The poor dead girl protects me against you; she is here, upon my
breast, asleep; she calms my heart. I feel myself terribly torn. I
should, perhaps, have had the baseness to pardon you, if you had come
into our chamber and there dragged yourself at my feet, for there you
would have been all-powerful over me, by reason of that infamous love
with which misery and abandonment have inspired me. Here, you can exert
no influence over my heart, no influence over my body. I still have upon
my lips Marie's soul, her last breath and her last kiss. I do not wish
your soiled mouth to take that soul from me."
Laurence paused, sobbing, gazing at me through her tears.
"Claude," murmured she, "you do not understand me, you have never
understood me. I love you. I never knew what you wanted of me; I gave
myself as I knew how to give myself. Why do you drive me away? I have
done no evil; if you think I have done evil, you can beat me and we will
still live in company."
I was weary, I felt my heart bleed; I was in haste to see this woman
depart, I implored her in my turn.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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