French fiction -- Translations into English; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; Young men -- Fiction
I beheld, from the gallery in which I found myself, a sort of oblong
hall, of quite large dimensions, ornamented with faded paintings and
gilding. A fine dust, raised by the dancers' feet, ascended slowly from
the floor, like a mist, and filled the place. The bright flames of the
gas looked red in this cloud; everything had a vague appearance, a
strange hue of old copper. At the further end of the hall, galloped a
frightful circle of creatures who could not be seen distinctly; the fury
of their movements seemed to communicate itself to the thick and
nauseous air; in the whirl, I thought I saw the walls tremble and turn
with the crowd. A piercing clamor, accompanied by a sort of prolonged
roll, drowned the music of the orchestra.
I cannot describe to you the first impressions produced on me by this
place, in which each thing had in my eyes a special and unknown life.
The shrill noises, the sonorous laughter bursting out like sobs, the
frightful contortions of the furious dancers, the biting and suffocating
odors, all came to me in a sharp sensation which filled my being with a
vague terror, with which was mingled a sad pleasure. I could not laugh,
for I felt my throat close, and yet I was unable to turn away my head,
so delirious was the joy I experienced amid my suffering. I now
understand the fascination of these exciting soirées. At the first
sight one trembles, one refuses to lend himself to the terrible gayety;
then intoxication comes, and, with bewildered brain, one abandons
himself to the gulf. Common souls are soon won over. Those who have the
strength of their dreams--dare I, brothers, count myself among
them?--revolt, and, in their frankness, regret the humble dancing-floors
of Provence upon which the awkward and lumbering peasant girls dance in
the fresh, clear night.
From the gallery in which we were, we could see only the general effect
of the scene. We quitted it, descending the stairways and reaching the
main floor by passing through narrow and dark passages. Arrived in the
ball-room, we were forced to follow a slender path contrived between the
walls and the quadrilles. All my pleasure was gone; I now felt only
disgust. The women were clad in tatters, in ragged silks spangled with
dirty brass; their bare shoulders were dripping with perspiration;
paint, in broad pools, in long streaks, reddened and blued their skin.
One of them, with an inflamed visage and a hoarse voice, turned towards
me, gesticulating and shouting. What a strange, hideous face she had! I
shall see it again in my bad dreams!
I do not remember having noticed the men. They were, it seems to me, for
the most part, standing straight and motionless, looking with great
calmness at the tumultuous bounds of the women. I cannot tell you what
kind of people they were, or if they appeared to comprehend the extent
of their idiocy.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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