"I really had no expectation of taking you in," replied the other. "I
have a habit of extending my hospitality impartially to all, and about
seven feet wide."
"You remind me," said the hippopotamus, "of a certain zebra who was
not vicious at all; he merely kicked the breath out of everything that
passed behind him, but did not induce things to pass behind him."
"It is quite immaterial what I remind you of," was the reply.
The lesson conveyed by this fable is a very beautiful one.
XIX.
A man was plucking a living goose, when his victim addressed him thus:
"Suppose _you_ were a goose; do you think you would relish this sort
of thing?"
"Well, suppose I were," answered the man; "do you think _you_ would
like to pluck me?"
"Indeed I would!" was the emphatic, natural, but injudicious reply.
"Just so," concluded her tormentor; "that's the way _I_ feel about the
matter."
XX.
A traveller perishing of thirst in a desert, debated with his camel
whether they should continue their journey, or turn back to an oasis
they had passed some days before. The traveller favoured the latter
plan.
"I am decidedly opposed to any such waste of time," said the animal;
"I don't care for oases myself."
"I should not care for them either," retorted the man, with some
temper, "if, like you, I carried a number of assorted water-tanks
inside. But as you will not submit to go back, and I shall not consent
to go forward, we can only remain where we are."
"But," objected the camel, "that will be certain death to you!"
"Not quite," was the quiet answer, "it involves only the loss of my
camel."
So saying, he assassinated the beast, and appropriated his liquid
store.
A compromise is not always a settlement satisfactory to both parties.
XXI.
A sheep, making a long journey, found the heat of his fleece very
uncomfortable, and seeing a flock of other sheep in a fold, evidently
awaiting for some one, leaped over and joined them, in the hope of
being shorn. Perceiving the shepherd approaching, and the other sheep
huddling into a remote corner of the fold, he shouldered his way
forward, and going up to the shepherd, said:
"Did you ever see such a lot of fools? It's lucky I came along to set
them an example of docility. Seeing me operated upon, they 'll be glad
to offer themselves."
"Perhaps so," replied the shepherd, laying hold of the animal's horns;
"but I never kill more than one sheep at a time. Mutton won't keep in
hot weather."
The chops tasted excellently well with tomato sauce.
The moral of this fable isn't what you think it is. It is this: The
chops of another man's mutton are _always_ nice eating.
XXII.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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