England -- Fiction; Gay men -- Fiction; Italy -- Fiction; Paranormal fiction
He revolted and rebelled. It was not for this that he had grown proud of
Dennis, delighting in his physical beauty, and in the sunshine of his
boyish vigour, and in the grace and charm of him. He had enjoyed them
with ever increasing zest because of the thought that someday Dennis
would be one with him in his allegiance to the Lord of hate. He had seen
himself bringing him to the tribunal of his choice, and beholding him
choose as he himself, with never a moment of regret, had chosen. Who, in
all the world of men with their callow consciences, their bloodless
ideals, their cold duties, had prospered as he had done, or whose days
succeeded each other in such procession of satisfaction? All that must
be Dennis’s: it was his unique birthright to be allowed to choose all
that the lust of the eye and the pride of the flesh and the glory of the
world could bestow with never an ache of compunction, or a sigh of pity,
or a pulse of love.
Colin got up; the rain had begun to hiss on the shrubs below his window.
He must have been sitting here for more than an hour, for the chimes in
the church a couple of hundred yards away struck three. He had not been
thinking consciously or with purpose: it was as if pictures had been
spread out in front of him on which he let his eyes rest. Now, as he
went across to his bed, there came an intenser focussing. It was well
enough that Dennis should come to him as he would have gone to his
mother, drawn there by the bonds of his love. Colin had meant to oust
Violet from the boy’s heart, and take her place, and, if nothing more at
present, Dennis had given him a niche of his own there. He wanted
Dennis’s affection and confidence, for it was through them that he would
most surely lead him.... It was natural, too, that he himself should
delight in the boy’s magnificent youth and abounding charm. But it was
not well that his own heart should have gone out to Dennis like that.
Whence had come that spark of soft authentic fire? Was it from some
remote and infinite conflagration, the warmth and the light of which can
penetrate the uttermost darkness?
Colin turned out his light, and curled himself up in bed as he had seen
Dennis do.
“That would be a nightmare indeed,” he thought....
* * * * *
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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