Colonel Carter's Christmas and The Romance of an Old-Fashioned GentlemanSmith, Francis Hopkinson
General
Colonel Carter's Christmas and The Romance of an Old-Fashioned Gentleman
Smith, Francis Hopkinson
Christmas stories; Virginia -- Fiction
This man was no less a person than the eminent financier, Mr. P. A.
Klutchem, of Klutchem, Skinham & Co., who, you will remember, had in
an open office and in the presence of many mutual friends, denounced
in unmeasured terms the Cartersville & Warrentown Air Line
Railroad--an enterprise to which the Virginian had lent his name and
which, with the help of his friend Mr. Fitzpatrick, he was then trying
to finance. Not content with thus slandering the road itself,
characterizing it as "beginning nowhere and ending nowhere," Mr.
Klutchem had even gone so far as to attack the good name of its
securities, known as the "Garden Spot" Bonds, and to state boldly that
he would not "give a yellow dog" for "enough of 'em to paper a
church." The Colonel's immediate resentment of this insult; his prompt
challenge to Mr. Klutchem to meet him in mortal duel; Mr. Klutchem's
refusal and the events which followed, are too well known to you to
need further reference here.
The death of this Mr. Klutchem some years ago decided me again to seek
the Colonel's permission to lay before my readers a succinct account,
first of what led up to this most important celebration, and then some
of the details of the celebration itself--one of the most delightful,
if not the most delightful, of all the many delightful festivals held
in the Colonel's cosy quarters on Bedford Place.
My communication drew from Colonel Carter the following characteristic
letter:
CARTER HALL, CARTERSVILLE, VA.,
MY DEAR MAJOR:
I have your very kind and welcome letter, and am greatly
impressed by the views you hold. I was averse at the time to
any reference being made to the matter to which you so
kindly refer, for the reason that some men are often more
sensitive over their virtues than they are over their
faults.
Mr. Klutchem's death, of course, completely alters the
situation, and you can make what use you please of the
incidents. In this decision I have been helped by my dear
Fitz, who spent last Sunday with us on his way South to
investigate a financial matter of enormous magnitude and
which only a giant intellect like his own can grasp. Fitz's
only fear--I quote his exact words, my dear Major,--is that
"you will let Klutchem down easy instead of roasting him
alive as he deserves," but then you must not mind Fitz, for
he always uses intemperate language when speaking of this
gentleman.
Your room is always ready for you, and if you will run down
to us now, we can smother you in roses. Chad is over his
cold, but the old man seems feeble at times. Aunt Nancy is
out in her coach paying some visits, and doesn't know I am
writing or she would certainly send you her love.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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