Colville of the Guards, Volume 3 (of 3)Grant, James
General
Colville of the Guards, Volume 3 (of 3)
Grant, James
British -- Afghanistan -- Fiction; Soldiers -- Fiction
Her whole soul was wrapped up in one idea--escape! But how was she
to achieve it, out of that accursed vessel, unless she cast herself
headlong into the river? She certainly shrank from self-destruction,
and hoped that something--'that vague something, the forlorn hope of
the desperate'--might intervene to save and set her free.
Sir Redmond's persistent love-making could draw no response from her.
This enraged him; he ground his teeth, while longing to take her in
his arms, and kiss her whether she would or not; yet he dared not
attempt to molest her when he was sober and in daylight; something in
the girl's purity and disgust of him repressed him. He dissembled,
and said, submissively,
'With your love, Ellinor--in offering mine--I would be a very
different man from what I have been.'
'Your love!' she muttered, in a low voice of scorn.
'Yes.'
'Dare you offer it again to me after all I know?'
'What a little tragedy spit-fire it is! Well, it is perhaps too much
to ask you to love me, so I will only crave permission to love you.'
'Insult on insult! Oh, this is intolerable!' exclaimed Ellinor,
covering her face with her hands. 'It is useless to remind a man
like you of his marriage.'
Sleath's eyes gleamed dangerously. He and Ellinor were alone in the
saloon, as Dewsnap and the sailing-master were smoking on deck, and
the companion-way was kept bolted to prevent any attempt at escape.
'What did I know of life, of the world, or of human nature when I met
that artful woman with the absurd name, Fubsby, and took vows--if
vows they were--for a life-time. Married! Well, even if I were so
legally--which I don't quite admit--what then? In the society in
which we move--'
'We?'
'Dewsnap and I--flirtation forms the great occupation--even
accomplishment--of married life on the part of those who are bound by
it. You have much to learn yet, my simple little Ellinor.'
'Do you call this conduct of yours flirtation--this illegal and
punishable abduction of me--and insulting, loathly love-making?'
'Loathly--an unpleasant phrase to use. Instead of the wretched life
you lead at Paddington, I can give you one well worth living,' said
he, as if he addressed a girl at a bar or a buffet, and in ignorance
of all that had passed since he had discovered their residence in St.
Mary's Terrace; 'and in turn, Ellinor, you will learn that a faithful
old lover is not to be despised.'
'I have already learned that,' said Ellinor, her tears beginning to
fall hotly as she thought of Robert Wodrow.
'I am glad to hear you say so,' said Sleath, thinking of himself,
'and to find that after all you cannot forget a man who has once
loved you--and loves you so fondly still, in spite of the coldness
you manifest and the obliquy you heap upon him. How grand it is to
forgive!' he continued, attempting to take her hand. 'The literary
bear Samuel Johnson never seemed so wretched as a man and a moralist,
than when he gloried in loving a _good hater_.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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