American fiction -- 19th century; Short stories, American
“Oh, Will!” she remonstrated. “Don’t tell me you’re such a
prig as that. What! if you loved me, if I loved you, you’d give me
up, you’d break my heart, just for fear lest idiotic people, whose
opinions don’t matter any more than the opinions of so many deep-sea
fish, might think you mercenary! When you and I both knew in our own two
souls that you really weren’t mercenary’ in the least! You’d pay
me a poor compliment, Will. Isn’t it conceivable that a man might love
me for myself?”
“You state the case too simply. You make no allowances for the shades
and complexities of a man’s feelings.”
“Bother shades and complexities. Love burns them up. Your shades and
complexities are nothing but priggishness and vanity,” she asserted
hotly. “But there! I’m actually getting angry over a purely
supposititious question. For, of course, we don’t really love each
other the least bit, do we, Will?” she asked him softly.
He appeared to be giving his whole attention to the rolling of a
cigarette; he did not answer. But his fingers trembled, and presently he
tore his paper, spilling half the tobacco in his lap.
Johannah watched him from eyes full of languid, half mocking, half
pensive laughter.
“Oh, dear, oh, dear,” she sighed again, by-and-by.
He looked at her; and he had to catch his breath. Lying there on the
turf, the skirts of her frock flowing round her in a sort of little
billowy white pool, her head deep in the scarlet cushion, her black
hair straying wantonly where it would about her face and brow, her eyes
lambent with that lazy, pensive laughter, one of her hands, pink and
white, warm and soft, fallen open on the grass between her and her
cousin, her whole person seeming to breathe a subtle scent of womanhood,
and the luxury and mystery of womanhood—oh, the sight of her, the
sense of her, there in the wide green stillness of the summer day, set
his heart burning and beating poignantly.
“Oh, dear, oh, dear,” she sighed, “I wish the man I am in love
with were only here.”
“Oh! You are in love with some one?” he questioned, with a little
start.
“Rather!” said she. “In love! I should think so. Oh, I love him,
love him, love him. Ah, if he were here! He wouldn’t waste this golden
afternoon as you’re doing. He’d take my hand—he’d hold it,
and press it, and kiss it; and he’d pour his soul out in tumultuous
celebration of my charms, in fiery avowals of his passion. If he were
here! Ah, me!”
“Where is he?” Will asked, in a dry’ voice.
“Ah, where indeed? I wish I knew.”
“I’ve never heard you speak of him before,” he reflected.
“There’s none so deaf as he that will not hear. I’ve spoken of
him to you at least a thousand times. He forms the staple of my
conversation.”
“I must be veryy deaf indeed. I swear this is absolutely news to
me.”
“Oh, Will, you are such a goose—or such a hypocrite,” said she.
“But it’s tea-time. Help me up.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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