GENTLEMAN (_astonished_). Jump out of the train? Madam, your strange conduct compels me to be serious! In a word, I have the honor to be a Government inspector of prisons! LADY. Eh? What? You--an inspector of prisons? GENTLEMAN. Yes, madam (_taking off his cap and bowing to LADY_). LADY (_eagerly looking at GENTLEMAN'S forehead_). And--you _haven't_ got a scar on your forehead? Oh, sir! if you only knew how delighted I am that you haven't got a scar on your forehead! GENTLEMAN (_bewildered_). A scar on my forehead? (_feeling his forehead_). But may I ask what has suggested to you all these notions about thieves and robbers? LADY. Why, you've been talking about nothing else for the last quarter of an hour! GENTLEMAN (_smiling_). I beg your pardon. You certainly first began the conversation about these--_gentlemen._ LADY. Because you said that you associated with them. GENTLEMAN. Naturally, as an inspector of prisons. LADY. Then those portraits--in your possession? GENTLEMAN. Were taken merely to forward the ends of justice! LADY (_with a sigh of relief_). I understand it all! I can laugh at my folly now, which entirely arose from this silly newspaper paragraph--the sole cause of all my absurd terror. GENTLEMAN. What newspaper paragraph? LADY. Read this, sir (_giving him newspaper_). GENTLEMAN (_looking at paper, and then giving way to a loud laugh_). Ha, ha, ha! Why, my dear madam, this is quite an old story! Our interesting friend, Mr. Burkshaw, happened to be shot in attempting his escape from Dartmoor more than twelve months ago! (_Looking at date of newspaper._) Of course, this paper is a year old--December, 1884! LADY. So it is! Oh, sir! what must you think of me? GENTLEMAN (_in a tender tone_). May I tell you? That you are the most charming travelling companion-- (_Here noise of train stopping, engine, railway-whistle, etc., heard._) VOICE (_outside_). Paddington! Paddington! (_LADY and GENTLEMAN both rise._) GENTLEMAN (_gallantly_). I am staying some time in London, madam. Will you permit me to call upon you, if only to remove from your mind any lingering doubt as to my perfect identity? LADY. With pleasure, sir! (_Suddenly, and in a very gracious tone._) Oh, sir! how _very_ good of you to be a Government inspector of prisons! (_holding out her hand to GENTLEMAN, who takes it and raises it to his lips_). VOICE (_again heard_). Paddington! (_The GENTLEMAN and LADY gather their packages and bow to each other as the CURTAIN FALLS._) TAKEN FROM THE FRENCH. _An Original Comedietta, in One Act._ DRAMATIS PERSONÆ. SIR FELIX FRITTERLY. ARTHUR VALLANCE. COLONEL COSEY. LADY FRITTERLY. MYRTLE VANE. SCENE.--Sir Felix Fritterly's Country-house. _A handsomely furnished apartment. Bay-window (practicable) with curtains at R. U. E., conservatory C., doors R. and L., couch at R. C., chairs, piano, etc. COLONEL discovered lying on couch, his handkerchief over his head--ARTHUR VALLANCE in morning costume._