Confessions of the CzarinaRadziwill, Catherine, Princess
History
Confessions of the Czarina
Radziwill, Catherine, Princess
Alexandra, Empress, consort of Nicholas II, Emperor of Russia, 1872-1918; Russia -- Court and courtiers
Neither the Czar nor his Consort thought about these things. As time
went on, the attention of the latter became more and more concentrated
on the one fixed idea of having a son. She imagined that the secret of
her unpopularity, which she had at last discovered, lay in the fact that
she had not been able to give an Heir to the Russian Throne. Four times
in succession daughters were born to her, each one received with
increased disappointment, as the years went on, bringing into prominence
the youngest brother of Nicholas II., the Grand-Duke Michael, whom the
Empress began hating with all her heart and soul. She imagined that
wherever she went she was greeted with reproaches for having failed to
fulfil the first duty of a Sovereign’s Consort, that of assuring his
succession in the direct line. The hysterical part of her temperament
rose to the surface more and more with each day that passed. She locked
herself up in her private apartments, refusing to see the members of her
family and denying herself to all visitors, until at last it began to be
whispered in Court circles that Alexandra Feodorowna’s mind was getting
unhinged and that she was suffering from religious mania, mixed up with
the dread of persecution from her relatives. She used to sob for hours
at a stretch, when no one could comfort her, and during those attacks of
despair one cry continually escaped her lips, and was repeated until she
could utter it no longer, out of sheer excitement and fatigue:
“Why, _why_ will God not grant me a son?”
VI
THE EMPRESS’S OPINIONS ABOUT RUSSIA
One of the points about which there has been the most discussion in
Russia is as to whether the Empress Alexandra had ever cared for the
country which had become her own. Her friends have repeatedly asserted
that she had become an ardent Russian patriot, and that her great,
particular misfortune was that every action, word, or thought of hers
had been misunderstood and this willingly.
As for her enemies, they declared, from the very first days which
followed upon her unlucky marriage, that she had arrived in Russia
imbued with the feelings of the deepest contempt for the country and its
people, and that all her efforts had been applied toward making out of
the Empire over which she reigned a vassal of her own native land.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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