Corporal Tikitanu, V.C.Fussell, J. C. (James Coldham)
General
Corporal Tikitanu, V.C.
Fussell, J. C. (James Coldham)
Māori (New Zealand people); World War, 1914-1918 -- Humor; World War, 1914-1918 -- New Zealand
Several of the sentries understood English and Henare was listened to
with undisguised interest. Then he was sent for, and taken between two
guards to a German officer, who was very affable to Henare, and asked
him several kindly and interesting questions. Had he quite recovered
from his unfortunate "gassing"? Did he get enough to eat? Was it the
kind of food the Maoris were used to? and so on.
After this the officer told the guards to withdraw twenty paces. He then
smiled at Henare and asked him, in broken English, whether he would like
plenty of money and a certain amount of freedom during his stay in
Germany.
Henare grinned and said that would be "kapai."
"Vell, you shust tell me some leedle tings about der English."
"All right, I know plenty ting about him. What yer want ter know?"
"Ah! dot is goot! Now tell me how much damage der German bombs do on
London."
"Wery bad, wery bad. Him brake down te shop, te church, te school, and
te piccanini."
"Och! anyting else?"
"Yeh; kill te plenty ole woman too; my word yeh, te Zepp wery bad for
ole Englan."
"Haf England got much food?"
"Not too many; only butter from Noo Zeelan."
The officer made a note of that, as a most significant fact. He then
asked:
"How many soldiers vos coming from New Zealand efery mont?"
"Oh, tousan an tousan. Not enuf ship yet to bring him all."
"How many Maoris vos der bein trained?"
"Oh, bout two million, I tink."
"Gott in himmel! Are dey as big as you?"
Henare grinned and said:
"Oh, te Maori bigger 'n me. Me te little bloke, all right. No room for
te big Maori on te ole troopship I came in."
The German looked thoughtful, and a bit suspicious.
"Are you telling me der truth?"
Henare fixed his soft brown eyes on the small blue-grey eyes of his
questioner, and said, with well-feigned indignation:
"Oh, py korry, me te Sunday School poy; what for you tink me tell a
lie?"
"Vell, I will ask you von more question:
"Vat do all dose big Maoris feed on?"
"Oh, te Pakeha no let te Maori eat up te prisoner now, so he eat te
poaka."
"Vat is der poaka?"
"Te pig, te Sher----, I mean te Noo Zeelan pig. But te Maori like te
prisoner more better."
Although the German officer was not at all satisfied with the result of
his enquiries, he made up his mind to treat Henare well, with the object
of getting all the information possible from him.
_VII._
EARNING THE V.C.
With their usual lack of humour, the Germans fondly imagined that they
would yet be able to get some valuable information out of the
"unsuspecting" native of New Zealand; for he seemed so agreeable and
talkative! Little did those self-conceited Teutons understand the
Maoris!
This being so, Henare was allowed a certain amount of liberty to ramble
about within a given area--well behind the lines.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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