Crusoe in New York, and other talesHale, Edward Everett
General
Crusoe in New York, and other tales
Hale, Edward Everett
New York (N.Y.) -- Fiction; Short stories, American; United States -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
As soon as the editor saw this, he wrote a note to the chief
contributor, and asked her to call at the office the next day. So soon
as she entered, he charged her with her guilt; and before the miserable
creature could reply, he drew his cimeter and cut off her head. He then
sent shorter notes to the lesser contributors; and as each one entered
the office, he explained briefly that he knew all, and, with his own
hand, beheaded him. He then ordered the porters and janitors to throw
the heads and bodies into the Jumna, and, with his brother's
assistance, he called in a new circle of new contributors, and made up
the next number of the "Friend of the City" from their poems and
articles. The director of advertisements and of press criticisms
manufactured reputations for them all, and the number was pronounced
the most brilliant number of the "Friend of the City" which had ever
been published.
Then the editor sent advance copies to each of these contributors, and
asked them to call at the office the next morning. As each one called,
the editor drew his cimeter and cut off the contributor's head. He then
called the porters and janitors, and bade them throw the carcasses and
heads into the Jumna, and proceeded to make up the next number. And
thus he did for three years.
As the third year passed, however, the assistant editors began to
observe that there was a certain difficulty in collecting poems and
articles. Nay, it was even whispered that in the publication office
they feared that the magazine was losing popularity. The rumors from
the publication office were not often permitted to exhale in the
editorial rooms. But still there was a suspicion that from the homes of
the authors, who had been cut short so summarily, there was going out a
sort of public opinion unfavorable to the renewal of subscriptions. As
for authors, for some time they presented themselves freely. Each poet
and each story-writer was quite sure that her communication was so much
better than anything which had ever been written before that they all
moved up to the fatal edge of publication with serenity, each quite
sure that for herself the rule would be reversed, and each quite sure
that the others deserved decapitation. But, as has been said, after
three years the steady supply of articles was a little checked, perhaps
because a rumor was put in circulation by the conductors of the "Pearl
of Wit" that the editor of the "Friend of the City" was crazy, and
could not if he would, and would not if he could, tell a bad article
from a good one.
All these rumors and contingencies made the position of the sub-editor
very uncomfortable as the third year drew to a close. He had to make up
each number all the same, and he had to direct the chief of the
advertisements how to make the reputations of the authors. But really
the authors were so short-lived now that the reputations were scarcely
worth the making.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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