Cumner's Son and Other South Sea Folk — Volume 04Parker, Gilbert
General
Cumner's Son and Other South Sea Folk — Volume 04
Parker, Gilbert
Oceania -- Fiction
Four hours passed. It was midnight. There was noise of drums and
shouting on the shore, which did not relieve our suspense. Suddenly
there was a commotion in the canoes that still remained near the
Wilderness. The headman appeared before us, and beckoned to Blithelygo
and myself to come. The beckoning was friendly, and we hoped that
affairs had taken a more promising turn.
In a space surrounded with palms and ti-trees a great fire was burning.
There was a monotonous roll of the savage tom-tom and a noise of shouting
and laughter. Yes, we were safe, and the American had done it. The
Coliseum was open, MacGregor was ring-master, and U. S. and Bob Lee were
at work. This show, with other influences, had conquered Pango Wango.
The American flag was hoisted on a staff, and on a mighty stump there sat
Van Blaricom, almost innocent of garments, I grieve to say, with one whom
we came to know as Totimalu, Queen of Pango Wango, a half circle of
savages behind them. Van Blaricom and MacGregor had been naturalised by
having their shoulders lanced with a spear-point, and then rubbed against
the lanced shoulders of the chiefs. The taking of Pango Wango had not
been, I fear, a moral victory. Van Blaricom was smoking a cigar, and was
writing on a piece of paper, using the back of a Pango Wango man as a
desk. The Queen's garments were chiefly variegated bath-towels, and she
was rubbing her beaming countenance and ample bosom with hair-oil and
essence of new-mown hay.
Van Blaricom nodded to us nonchalantly, saying: "It's all right--she's
Totimalu, the Queen. Sign here, Queen," and he motioned for the obese
beauty to hold the pencil. She did so, and then he stood up, and, while
the cock-fight still went on, he read, with a fine Chicago fluency, what
proved to be a proclamation. As will be seen, it was full of ellipses
and was fragmentary in its character, though completely effective in fact:
Know all men by these Presents, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.
Seeing that all men are born free and equal (vide United States
Constitution), et cetera. We, Jude Van Blaricom, of the city of
Chicago, with and by the consent of Queen Totimalu, do, in the name
of George Washington, Abe Lincoln, Grover Cleveland, and the State
of Illinois, and by the Grace of Heaven, et cetera, et cetera, et
cetera, hereby annex the Kingdom of Pango Wango to be of the
territory of the American Union, to have and to hold from this day
forth (vide Constitution of the United States), et cetera.
Signed, JUDE VAN BLARICOM, TOTIMALU X (her mark).
"Beat the drums, you niggers!" he cried, and patted Totimalu's shoulder.
"Come and join the royal party, gentlemen, and pay your respects. Shake!
That's right."
Thus was Pango Wango annexed.
AN AMIABLE REVENGE
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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