A trip to Australia, how he would enjoy it! To be quite away from
London and his present conventional life. The only pain was the
thought of parting with Sibyl. But he would do his business quickly,
and come back and clasp her in his arms, and kiss her again and look
into her eyes and--turn round; yes, he would turn short round and
choose the right path, and be what she really thought him, a good man.
In a very small degree, he would be the sort of man his child imagined
him.
As these thoughts flashed before his mind he forgot that dinner was
cooling in the dining-room, that he himself had eaten nothing for some
hours, and that a curious faintness which he had experienced once or
twice before had stolen over him. He did not like it nor quite
understand it. He rose, crossed the room, and was about to ring the
bell when a sudden spasm of most acute pain passed like a knife
through his chest. He was in such agony that for a moment he was
unable to stir. The sharpness of the pain soon went off, and he sank
into a chair faint and trembling. He was now well enough to ring his
bell. He did so, and the footman appeared.
"Bring me brandy, and be quick," said Ogilvie.
The man started when he saw his face. He soon returned with the
stimulant, which Ogilvie drank off. The agony in his chest subsided by
degrees, and he was able to go into the dining-room and even to eat.
He had never before had such terrible and severe pain, and now he was
haunted by the memory of his father, who had died suddenly of acute
disease of the heart.
After dinner he went, as usual, to his club, where he met a friend
whom he liked. They chatted about many things, and the fears and
apprehensions of the puzzled man dropped gradually from him. It was
past midnight when Ogilvie returned home. He had now forgotten all
about the pain in his chest. It had completely passed away. He felt
as well and vigorous as ever. In the night, however, he slept badly,
had tiresome dreams, and was much haunted by the thought of his child.
If by any chance he were to die now! If, for instance, he died on his
way to Australia, he would leave Sibyl badly provided for. A good deal
of his private means had already been swallowed up by his own and his
wife's extravagant living, and what was left of it had been settled
absolutely on his wife at the time of their marriage. Although, of
course, this money at her mother's death would revert to Sibyl, he had
a presentiment, which he knew was founded on a firm basis, that Mrs.
Ogilvie might be careless, inconsiderate--not kind, in the true sense
of the word, to the little girl. If it came to be a tussle between
Sibyl's needs and her mother's fancied necessities, Ogilvie's
intuitions told him truly that Sibyl would go to the wall.
"I must do something better than that for my little daughter," thought
the man. "I will not go to Australia until I have decided that point.
If I go, I shall make terms, and it will be for Sibyl's sake."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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