Psychological fiction; Science fiction; United States -- Fiction
At a quarter to eight I walked ten blocks to work. There were the
usual hectic early morning traffic jams. Wagon-loads of produce and
half-starved horses blocking the streets. The same man was beating a
nag with a board. A wagon piled with fruit and vegetables was stuck in
a pot hole in the pavement. Two men were carrying a spinning wheel into
the front of an apartment building. A peddler was selling oil lanterns,
wicks and kerosene out of a barrel. The same women and boys in dirty
sheepskin jackets were hauling rickshaws.
I really didn't see anyone or speak to anyone. I didn't know anyone. I
knew I was safe and had nothing to worry about. Once a week I used up
my GI liquor chit at a bar with a Security seal on the window. Twice
a week, I slept over at a GI brothel, where every girl had a Security
clearance number tattoed on her thigh.
I had nothing to worry about.
I was passed through three gates by guards and went to my little cage
inside Pentagon Circle, local headquarters of the Department of
Internal Security.
Until that Tuesday morning I couldn't remember ever having done
anything but sort colored cards. My chief qualification for my job:
I wasn't color blind. When a green card with figures on it meaning
nothing to me came out of a slot in the wall, I pushed it into a green
slot that led somewhere into a filing department. When a red card came
out, I pushed it into a red slot, and so forth. There were cards of
fifteen colors.
Another qualification: my unconscious efficiency. I never had even a
hint of an abstract thought. I never remembered yesterday, let alone
the day before. And until that Tuesday morning I never made even a tiny
mistake.
I had no idea what I was doing. Nor was I at all curious. Curiosity was
highly suspect. Curiosity was dangerous in the best of all possible
worlds. It was ridiculous in a state where people had never had it so
good.
Cards sped from my hands always into correct slots. Care-free hours
slipped painlessly by into the dead past. I was sure I was safe and not
thinking at all. I was a blessed blank. And then all at once--
"_The eyes are the windows of the soul._"
The thought meant nothing to me, except it was wrong, it didn't belong
in the routine. The routine flew to pieces. My efficiency blew up.
I felt like a shiny bottle in a row of bottles with a sudden crack
running down the middle. Red cards hit blue slots. Green cards hit
yellow slots. Cards piled up, spilled over the floor. The more I tried
to return to my efficiency, the worse everything was.
My suit was wet with sweat. I thought of Mr. Donnicker. If a man's
routine broke, it could only be because some inner guilt was disrupting
his harmony. A happy person is an efficient person. Inefficiency is the
symptom of a guilty conscience.
"Mr. Fredricks," a voice whispered. "You're replaced here."
A cold paralysis gripped me.
"Get up, Fred."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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