I have also to inform you that the John Grier Home is undergoing a very
searching physical examination, and it is the shocking truth that out
of the twenty-eight poor little rats so far examined only five are up to
specification. And the five have not been here long.
Do you remember the ugly green reception room on the first floor? I have
removed as much of its greenness as possible, and fitted it up as the
doctor's laboratory. It contains scales and drugs and, most professional
touch of all, a dentist's chair and one of those sweet grinding
machines. (Bought them second-hand from Doctor Brice in the village, who
is putting in, for the gratification of his own patients, white enamel
and nickel-plate.) That drilling machine is looked upon as an infernal
engine, and I as an infernal monster for instituting it. But every
little victim who is discharged FILLED may come to my room every day for
a week and receive two pieces of chocolate. Though our children are not
conspicuously brave, they are, we discover, fighters. Young Thomas Kehoe
nearly bit the doctor's thumb in two after kicking over a tableful of
instruments. It requires physical strength as well as skill to be dental
adviser to the J. G. H. . . . . . . . . . .
Interrupted here to show a benevolent lady over the institution. She
asked fifty irrelevant questions, took up an hour of my time, then
finally wiped away a tear and left a dollar for my "poor little
charges."
So far, my poor little charges are not enthusiastic about these new
reforms. They don't care much for the sudden draft of fresh air that has
blown in upon them, or the deluge of water. I am shoving in two baths
a week, and as soon as we collect tubs enough and a few extra faucets,
they are going to get SEVEN.
But at least I have started one most popular reform. Our daily bill
of fare has been increased, a change deplored by the cook as causing
trouble, and deplored by the rest of the staff as causing an immoral
increase in expense. ECONOMY spelt in capitals has been the guiding
principle of this institution for so many years that it has become a
religion. I assure my timid co-workers twenty times a day that, owing to
the generosity of our president, the endowment has been exactly doubled,
and that I have vast sums besides from Mrs. Pendleton for necessary
purposes like ice cream. But they simply CAN'T get over the feeling that
it is a wicked extravagance to feed these children.
The doctor and I have been studying with care the menus of the past, and
we are filled with amazement at the mind that could have devised them.
Here is one of her frequently recurring dinners:
Boiled potatoes
Boiled rice
Blanc mange
It's a wonder to me that the children are anything more than one hundred
and eleven little lumps of starch.
Looking about this institution, one is moved to misquote Robert
Browning.
"There may be heaven; there must be hell;
Meantime, there is the John Grier--well!"
S. McB.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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