At first she--he had early come to think of the being as feminine--had
seemed timid, fearful lest her intrusions into his mind prove a
nuisance. It took some time for him to assure her that she was always
welcome. With time, too, his impression of her grew stronger and more
concrete. He found that he was able to visualize her, as he might
visualize something remembered, or conceived of in imagination--a lovely
young girl, slender and clothed in something loose and filmy, with
flowers in her honey-colored hair, and clear blue eyes, a pert, cheerful
face, a wide, smiling mouth and an impudently up-tilted nose. He
realized that this image was merely a sort of allegorical
representation, his own private object-abstraction from a reality which
his senses could never picture as it existed.
It was about this time that he had begun to call her Dearest. She had
given him no name, and seemed quite satisfied with that one.
"I've been thinking," she said, "I ought to have a name for you, too. Do
you mind if I call you Popsy?"
"Huh?" He had been really startled at that. If he needed any further
proof of Dearest's independent existence, that was it. Never, in the
uttermost depths of his subconscious, would he have been likely to label
himself Popsy. "Know what they used to call me in the Army?" he asked.
"Slaughterhouse Hampton. They claimed I needed a truckload of sawdust to
follow me around and cover up the blood." He chuckled. "Nobody but you
would think of calling me Popsy."
There was a price, he found, that he must pay for Dearest's
companionship--the price of eternal vigilance. He found that he was
acquiring the habit of opening doors and then needlessly standing aside
to allow her to precede him. And, although she insisted that he need not
speak aloud to her, that she could understand any thought which he
directed to her, he could not help actually pronouncing the words, if
only in a faint whisper. He was glad that he had learned, before the end
of his plebe year at West Point, to speak without moving his lips.
Besides himself and the kitten, Smokeball, there was one other at
"Greyrock" who was aware, if only faintly, of Dearest's presence. That
was old Sergeant Williamson, the Colonel's Negro servant, a retired
first sergeant from the regiment he had last commanded. With increasing
frequency, he would notice the old Negro pause in his work, as though
trying to identify something too subtle for his senses, and then shake
his head in bewilderment.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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