That is where we stand. For us, death is the one event that counts in
our life and in our universe. It is the point whereat all that escapes
our vigilance unites and conspires against our happiness. The more our
thoughts struggle to turn away from it, the closer do they press
around it. The more we dread it, the more dreadful it becomes, for it
battens but on our fears. He who seeks to forget it burdens his memory
with it; he who tries to shun it meets naught else. But, though we
think of death incessantly, we do so unconsciously, without learning
to know death. We compel our attention to turn its back upon it,
instead of going to it with uplifted head. We exhaust all our forces,
which ought to face death boldly, in distracting our will from it. We
deliver death into the dim hands of instinct and we grant it not one
hour of our intelligence. Is it surprising that the idea of death,
which should be the most perfect and the most luminous--being the most
persistent and the most inevitable--remains the flimsiest of our ideas
and the only one that is backward? How should we know the one power
which we never looked in the face? How could it profit by flashes
kindled only to help us escape it? To fathom its abysses, we wait
until the most enfeebled, the most disordered moments of our life
arrive. We do not think of death until we have no longer the strength,
I will not say, to think, but even to breathe. A man returning among
us from another century would not recognize without difficulty, in the
depths of a present-day soul, the image of his gods, of his duty, of
his love or of his universe; but the figure of death, when everything
has changed around it and when even that which composes it and
upon which it rests has vanished, he would find almost untouched,
rough-drawn as it was by our fathers, hundreds, nay, thousands of
years ago. Our intelligence, grown so bold and active, has not worked
upon this figure, has added no single touch to it. Though we may no
longer believe in the tortures of the damned, all the vital cells of
the most skeptical among us are still steeped in the appalling mystery
of the Hebrew Sheol, the pagan Hades, or the Christian Hell. Though it
may no longer be lighted by very definite flames, the gulf still opens
at the end of life, and, if less known, is all the more formidable.
And, therefore, when the impending hour strikes to which we dared not
raise our eyes, everything fails us at the same time. Those two or
three uncertain ideas whereon, without examining them, we had meant to
lean, give way like rushes beneath the weight of the last moments. In
vain we seek a refuge among reflections that rave or are strange to us
and do not know the roads to our heart. No one awaits us on the last
shore where all is unprepared, where naught remains afoot save terror.
III
WE MUST ENLIGHTEN AND ESTABLISH
OUR IDEA OF DEATH
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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