England -- Fiction; Socialism -- Fiction; Socialists -- Fiction
The reply was not such as completes the blessedness of pure submission.
Adela averted her eyes. Another woman would perchance have sought
to assure herself that she was right in crediting him with private
benevolence to the family he was compelled to visit so severely. Such
a question Adela could not ask. It would have been to betray doubt; she
imagined a replying glance which would shame her. To love, to honour, to
obey:--many times daily she repeated to herself that threefold vow, and
hitherto the first article had most occupied her striving heart. But she
must not neglect the second; perhaps it came first in natural order.
At the gate Richard nodded to her kindly.
‘Good-bye. Be a good girl.’
What was it that caused a painful flutter at her heart as he spoke so?
She did not answer, but watched him for a few moments as he walked away.
Did _he_ love _her_? The question which she had not asked herself for a
long time came of that heart-tremor. She had been living so unnatural
a life for a newly wedded woman, a life in which the intellect and the
moral faculties held morbid predominance. ‘Be a good girl.’ How was it
that the simple phrase touched her to emotion quite different in kind
from any thing she had known since her marriage, more deeply than any
enthusiasm, as with a comfort more sacred than any she had known in
prayer? As she turned to go back to the house a dizziness affected her
eyes; she had to stand still for a moment. Involuntarily she clasped her
hands upon her bosom and looked away into the blue summer sky. Did
he love her? She had never asked him that, and all at once she felt a
longing to hasten after him and utter the question. Would he know what
she meant?
Was it the instantaneous reward for having conscientiously striven
to honour him? That there should be love on his side had not hitherto
seemed of so much importance; probably she had taken it for granted; she
had been so preoccupied with her own duties. Yet now it had all at once
become of moment that she should know. ‘Be a good girl.’ She repeated
the words over and over again, and made much of them. Perhaps she had
given him no opportunity, no encouragement, to say all he felt; she knew
him to be reserved in many things.
As she entered the house the dizziness again troubled her. But it passed
as before.
Mr. Keene, who had stayed over-night, was waiting to take leave of her;
the trap which would carry him to Agworth station had just driven up.
Adela surprised the poor journalist by the warmth with which she shook
his hand, and the kindness of her farewell. She was not deceived as
to the motive of his visit, and just now she allowed herself to feel
sympathy for him, though in truth she did not like the man.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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