England -- Fiction; Socialism -- Fiction; Socialists -- Fiction
The fervour with which he pleaded went far to convince himself; for
the moment he lost sight of everything but the necessity of persuading
Adela, and his zeal could scarcely have been greater had he been
actuated by the purest unselfishness. He was speaking as Adela had
never heard him speak, with modulations of the voice which were almost
sentimental, like one pleading for love. In his heart he despaired of
removing her scruples, but he overcame this with vehement entreaty.
A true instinct forbade him to touch on her own interests; he had not
lived so long with Adela without attaining some perception of the nobler
ways of thought. But as often as he raised his eyes to hers he saw the
futility of all his words. Her direct gaze at length brought him to
unwilling silence.
‘Would you then,’ Adela asked gravely, ‘destroy this will?’
‘Yes.’
The monosyllable was all he cared to reply.
‘I can scarcely believe you. Such a thing is impossible. You could not
do it.’
‘It’s my duty to do it.’
‘This is unworthy of you. It is a crime, in law and in conscience. How
can you so deceive yourself? After such an act as that, whatever you did
would be worthless, vain.’
‘Why?’
‘Because no one can do great work of the kind you aim at unless he is
himself guided by the strictest honour. Every word you spoke would be a
falsehood. Oh, can’t you see that, as plainly as the light of day? The
results of your work! Why, nothing you could possibly do with all
this money would be one-half as good as to let everyone know that you
honourably gave it up when it was in your power dishonestly to keep
it! Oh, surely _that_ is the kind of example that the world needs! What
causes all the misery but dishonesty and selfishness? If you do away
with that, you gain all you are working for. The example! You should
prize the opportunity. You are deceiving yourself; it is a temptation
that you are yielding to. Think a moment; you will see that I am right.
You cannot do a thing so unworthy of yourself.’
He stood for a moment doggedly, then replied:
‘I can and I shall do it.’
‘Never!’ Adela rose and faced him. ‘You shall listen to me till you
understand. You, who pride yourself on your high motives! For your own
sake scorn this temptation. Let me take the will away. I will put it
somewhere till to-morrow. You will see clearly by then. I know how
dreadful this loss seems to you, but you must be stronger.’
He stood between her and the table on which the parchment lay, and waved
her back as she approached. Adela’s voice trembled, but there was not a
note in it that he could resent.
‘You wrong yourself, and you are cruel to me. How could I live with you
if you did such a thing? How could I remain in this house when it was
no longer yours? It is impossible, a thousand times impossible. You
_cannot_ mean it! If you do this in spite of everything I can say, you
are more cruel than if you raised your hand and struck me. You make my
life a shame; you dishonour and degrade me.’
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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