Di saw that nothing short of the truth would wrest his persistence from
its object.
"Yes, I do," she said passionately, trembling from head to foot. "For
some one who does not care for me. You and I are both in the same
position. Do you see now how useless it is to talk of this any longer?"
Both had risen to their feet. Lord Hemsworth looked at Di's white
convulsed face, and his own became as ashen. He saw at last that he had
no more chance of marrying her than if she were lying at his feet in
her coffin. Constancy, which can compass many things, avails nought
sometimes.
"I beg your pardon," he said, holding out his hand to go.
"I think I ought to beg yours," she said brokenly, while their hands
clasped tightly each in each. "I never meant to make you as--unhappy
as--as I am myself, but yet I have."
They looked at each other with tears in their eyes.
"It does not matter," said Lord Hemsworth, hoarsely. "I shall be all
right--it's you--I think of. Don't stand--mustn't stand--you're too
tired. Good-bye."
* * * * *
Di flung herself down on her face on the sofa as the door closed. She
had forgotten Lord Hemsworth's existence the moment after he had left
the room. _John had told him that there was nothing between her and_
_himself._ John had told him that. John had said that. A cry escaped
her, and she strangled it in the cushion.
Hope does not always die when we imagine it does. It is subject to long
trances. The hope which she had thought dead was only giving up the
ghost now. "Chaque esperance est un oeuf d'ou peut sortir un serpent au
lieu d'une colombe." Out of that frail shell of a cherished hope lying
broken before her the serpent had crept at last. It moved, it grew
before her eyes.
"Slighted love is sair to bide."
CHAPTER XII.
"We met, hand to hand,
We clasped hands close and fast,
As close as oak and ivy stand;
But it is past."
CHRISTINA ROSSETTI.
"Half false, half fair, all feeble."
SWINBURNE.
When John roused himself from the long stupor into which he had fallen
after Lord Hemsworth's departure, he put his finished letter to Colonel
Tempest into an envelope, and then remembered with annoyance that he did
not know how to address it. When the landlady in Brook Street had told
him that Colonel and Captain Tempest had gone to Brighton that morning,
he had been too much taken aback at the moment to think of asking for
their address. He was too much exhausted in mind and body to go back to
the lodgings for it immediately. He wrote a second letter, this time to
his lawyer, and then, conscious of the state of his body by the shaking
hand and clumsy, tardy brain which made of a short and explicit
statement so lengthy an affair, he mechanically changed his clothes,
dined, and sat watching the smoke of his cigar.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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