Golf stories, English; Golfers -- Fiction; Humorous stories, English
About Ferdinand’s driving there was as a general thing a fatal
stiffness and over-caution which prevented success. And with his
chip-shots he rarely achieved accuracy owing to his habit of rearing
his head like the lion of the jungle just before the club struck the
ball. But to-day he had been swinging with a careless freedom, and his
chips had been true and clean. The thing had puzzled him all the way
round. It had not elated him, for, owing to Barbara’s aloofness and
the way in which she had gambolled about George Parsloe like a young
lamb in the springtime, he was in too deep a state of dejection to be
elated by anything. And now, suddenly, in a flash of clear vision,
he perceived the reason why he had been playing so well to-day. It
was just because he was not elated. It was simply because he was so
profoundly miserable.
That was what Ferdinand told himself as he stepped off the sixteenth,
after hitting a screamer down the centre of the fairway, and I am
convinced that he was right. Like so many indifferent golfers,
Ferdinand Dibble had always made the game hard for himself by thinking
too much. He was a deep student of the works of the masters, and
whenever he prepared to play a stroke he had a complete mental list of
all the mistakes which it was possible to make. He would remember how
Taylor had warned against dipping the right shoulder, how Vardon had
inveighed against any movement of the head; he would recall how Ray had
mentioned the tendency to snatch back the club, how Braid had spoken
sadly of those who sin against their better selves by stiffening the
muscles and heaving.
The consequence was that when, after waggling in a frozen manner
till mere shame urged him to take some definite course of action, he
eventually swung, he invariably proceeded to dip his right shoulder,
stiffen his muscles, heave, and snatch back the club, at the same time
raising his head sharply as in the illustrated plate (“Some Frequent
Faults of Beginners--No. 3--Lifting the Bean”) facing page thirty-four
of James Braid’s _Golf Without Tears_. To-day he had been so
preoccupied with his broken heart that he had made his shots absently,
almost carelessly, with the result that at least one in every three had
been a lallapaloosa.
Meanwhile, George Parsloe had driven off and the match was progressing.
George was feeling a little flustered by now. He had been given to
understand that this bird Dibble was a hundred-at-his-best man, and all
the way round the fellow had been reeling off fives in great profusion,
and had once actually got a four. True, there had been an occasional
six, and even a seven, but that did not alter the main fact that the
man was making the dickens of a game of it. With the haughty spirit of
one who had once done a ninety-four, George Parsloe had anticipated
being at least three up at the turn. Instead of which he had been two
down, and had to fight strenuously to draw level.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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