Golf stories, English; Golfers -- Fiction; Humorous stories, English
“Yes. Nobody is to blame. Everything was done with the best intentions.
But there it is.”
“But I don’t understand.”
Rollo explained. Mary listened pallidly.
“Are you sure?” she gasped.
“Quite sure,” said Rollo, gravely. “The arrowroot tasted rummy.”
“But arrowroot always does.”
Rollo shook his head.
“No,” he said. “It tastes like warm blotting-paper, but not rummy.”
Mary was sniffing.
“Don’t cry,” urged Rollo, tenderly. “Don’t cry.”
“But I must. And I’ve come out without a handkerchief.”
“Permit me,” said Rollo, producing one of her best from his left
breast-pocket.
“I wish I had a powder-puff,” said Mary.
“Allow me,” said Rollo. “And your hair has become a little disordered.
If I may--” And from the same reservoir he drew a handful of hairpins.
Mary gazed at these exhibits with astonishment.
“But these are mine,” she said.
“Yes. I sneaked them from time to time.”
“But why?”
“Because I loved you,” said Rollo. And in a few moving sentences which
I will not trouble you with he went on to elaborate this theme.
Mary listened with her heart full of surging emotions, which I cannot
possibly go into if you persist in looking at that damned watch of
yours. The scales had fallen from her eyes. She had thought slightingly
of this man because he had been a little over-careful of his health,
and all the time he had had within him the potentiality of heroism.
Something seemed to snap inside her.
“Rollo!” she cried, and flung herself into his arms.
“Mary!” muttered Rollo, gathering her up.
“I told you it was all nonsense,” said Mrs. Willoughby, coming up at
this tense moment and going on with the conversation where she had left
off. “I’ve just seen Letty, and she said she meant to put you out of
your misery but the chemist wouldn’t sell her any poison, so she let it
go.”
Rollo disentangled himself from Mary.
“What?” he cried.
Mrs. Willoughby repeated her remarks.
“You’re sure?” he said.
“Of course I’m sure.”
“Then why did the arrowroot taste rummy?”
“I made inquiries about that. It seems that mother was worried
about your taking to smoking, and she found an advertisement in one
of the magazines about the Tobacco Habit Cured in Three Days by a
secret method without the victim’s knowledge. It was a gentle, safe,
agreeable method of eliminating the nicotine poison from the system,
strengthening the weakened membranes, and overcoming the craving; so
she put some in your arrowroot every night.”
There was a long silence. To Rollo Podmarsh it seemed as though the sun
had suddenly begun to shine, the birds to sing, and the grasshoppers
to toot. All Nature was one vast substantial smile. Down in the valley
by the second hole he caught sight of Wallace Chesney’s Plus Fours
gleaming as their owner stooped to play his shot, and it seemed to him
that he had never in his life seen anything so lovely.
“Mary,” he said, in a low, vibrant voice, “will you wait here for me?
I want to go into the club-house for a moment.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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