Don't marry : $b or, Advice on how, when and who to marry — John Shaqi
Don't marry : $b or, Advice on how, when and who to marryDonovan, James W.
General
Don't marry : $b or, Advice on how, when and who to marry
Donovan, James W.
Marriage
The history of nine out of ten of such unnatural unions is a record
of a half million or so squandered on a petted daughter to satisfy a
mother’s ambition, and ending in misery entailed by the dearly bought
purchase. Don’t marry so much out of rank as to be a burden, or carry a
burden.
_Do marry a man that you can look up to_, and see that he can
do likewise. There are plenty of farmers, mechanics, merchants,
conductors, doctors, lawyers, and men of general business, who are
worthy, trusty, generous, noble, and will make excellent husbands.
Seek them out from their character, their conduct at home, their
treatment of sisters and mothers, their devotion to business and
adherence to principle. Show them that you trust them. Be ready to
marry. Become accomplished and useful. Make yourself worthy of a home,
and know how to manage it with skill and kindness. Loving natures are
not long neglected. The worn-out belles and women who fade and wither,
and die snappish and single, were insincere, or lacked some quality of
winning manners.
_Do marry a President._ That is the correct form now. It’s so romantic.
Waive all the hints of other objections,--age, love, spite, money, and
the like. Get a President,--just for the position, you know!
Then all the little jewels and diamonds and presents will come rolling
in like flowers to a favorite singer. All little objections vanish in
the presence of a President. He must be suited to any condition of
beauty, genius, or intellect. Don’t refuse a President’s offer; you may
never get but one such in a lifetime.
_Do marry a plain man._ Just a plain, common-sense man; be he banker,
lawyer, doctor, farmer, builder, merchant, so he is a man; for manhood
is at a premium to-day in home life! The world is full to overflowing
with brilliant men. Public offices are public trusts, and all that such
responsibility implies, and there are women in stations where the word
home has very little meaning, and other women who long for the quiet
and comfort of true domestic life away from the cares of office and the
demands of lofty stations.
Two of the things that lead to greatest misery of the masses to-day are
over-ambition and reckless marriages.
_Don’t coax a woman to love you._ If you wish to win, that is certainly
the wrong way. If they have any notion of it, you are in the opposite
direction of success.
Women despise a fawning, cringing nature. “Fortune and women, born to
be controlled, stoop to the forward and the bold.”
A far more sensible way to win will be by indifference. Show enough
willingness to reassure her, and enough courage to act manly.
Ten to one you have mistaken her temper by lack of frankness. Nothing
is more touching than truth. If you are really bent on marrying and
have told the right person the whole story, earnestly and truthfully,
the answer should be decisive.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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