Now you’re going to cry, “Nonsense! Look at Mrs. Plenteous; she’s
enormous, and as healthy as a horse.”
Well, we don’t know Mrs. Plenteous personally, but we’ll take your word
that she’s a human being, and as such she was never intended to be
enormous. She was made according to a careful pattern that hasn’t varied
in thousands of years, by an expert designer who put strength and
usefulness and beauty into his designs. Mrs. Plenteous has the
regulation number of bones, muscles, and vital organs (barring
operations). None of them is enormous. Each was built to carry around a
certain weight without undue strain. If Mrs. Plenteous is enormous, her
organs are carrying around an enormous strain. They _can_ take it—for a
while—and they _will_—for a while. But Mrs. Plenteous is not really
healthy, she’s just lucky—so far.
DON’T TAKE OUR WORD FOR IT
Ask your doctor. Ask your insurance agent (if you can edge in a word).
They will tell you, we think, that excessive waistlines tend to go along
with shorter lifelines. Medical records warn us that the overweight (or
underweight, see page 21) person is much more susceptible to illness
than the person whose weight is normal. And how surgeons loathe
operating through layers of fat! And by the way, look around you at a
roomful of elderly people. Aren’t most of them rather willowy? The
“enormous” ones left early.
SAFETY FIRST!
There are so many tricky health questions involved in reducing that we
are not going to take the responsibility of advising you specifically
how to do it. We do suggest, however, that you:
1) See your doctor. If you haven’t a doctor of your own, see somebody
else’s. He’ll be glad to become yours for the asking. He knows much more
about you than you do, having spent a great deal of time and money to
learn it, which you never did. Perhaps an ordinary reducing diet is not
for you. Perhaps you have funny glands or a messy metabolism, which he
will discover by careful tests and experiments. Perhaps you are not as
overweight as you think you are.
2) Do what your doctor tells you. This will surprise him very much, but
will also please and flatter him, and will cause him to work like mad on
your case.
[Illustration: uncaptioned]
3) Don’t take any advice from your friends. You know very well that you
don’t agree with their politics, approve of their hats, or care much for
their children. Why should you trust them on a matter much more intimate
and vital?
4) Don’t try short cuts. It took time to put on those extra pounds, and
it will take time to get them off. Don’t be beguiled by success stories
of fad diets or slimming salts. You want to reduce your weight
_only_—not your chances of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.
These magic potions may be harmless in nine cases out of ten, but it’s
maybe just _your_ luck to draw number ten!
[Illustration: uncaptioned]
WHERE DO WE GO FROM HERE, GIRLS?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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