Grace followed last with Mr. Libby, very heavy-hearted and reckless.
She had not only that sore self-accusal; but the degradation of the
affair, its grotesqueness, its spiritual squalor, its utter
gracelessness, its entire want of dignity, were bitter as death in her
proud soul. It was not in this shameful guise that she had foreseen the
good she was to do. And it had all come through her own wilfulness and
self-righteousness. The tears could mix unseen with the rain that
drenched her face, but they blinded her, and half-way up the steps she
stumbled on her skirt, and would have fallen, if the young man had not
caught her. After that, from time to time he put his arm about her, and
stayed her against the gusts.
Before they reached the top he said, “Miss Breen, I’m awfully sorry for
all this. Mrs. Maynard will be ashamed of what she said. Confound it!
If Maynard were only here!”
“Why should she be ashamed?” demanded Grace. “If she had been drowned,
I should have murdered her, and I’m responsible if anything happens to
her,—I am to blame.” She escaped from him, and ran into the house. He
slunk round the piazza to the kitchen door, under the eyes of the
ladies watching at the parlor windows.
“I wonder he let the others carry her up,” said Miss Gleason. “Of
course, he will marry her now,—when she gets her divorce.” She spoke of
Mrs. Maynard, whom her universal toleration not only included in the
mercy which the opinions of the other ladies denied her, but round whom
her romance cast a halo of pretty possibilities as innocently
sentimental as the hopes of a young girl.
IV.
The next morning Grace was sitting beside her patient, with whom she
had spent the night. It was possibly Mrs. Maynard’s spiritual toughness
which availed her, for she did not seem much the worse for her
adventure: she had a little fever, and she was slightly hoarser; but
she had died none of the deaths that she projected during the watches
of the night, and for which she had chastened the spirit of her
physician by the repeated assurance that she forgave her everything,
and George Maynard everything, and hoped that they would be good to her
poor little Bella. She had the child brought from its crib to her own
bed, and moaned over it; but with the return of day and the duties of
life she appeared to feel that she had carried her forgiveness far
enough, and was again remembering her injuries against Grace, as she
lay in her morning gown on the lounge which had been brought in for her
from the parlor.
“Yes, Grace, I shall always say if I had died and I may die yet—that I
did not wish to go out with Mr. Libby, and that I went purely to please
you. You forced me to go. I can’t understand why you did it; for I
don’t suppose you wanted to _kill_ us, whatever you did.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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