Bildungsromans; Psychological fiction; Young women -- Fiction
Roddy would smile his cynical smile because she had behaved just as
women always did behave: so long as they hooked some poor devil--no
matter whom--they were quite satisfied. And a damned fuss they made if a
chap refused to be hooked.
Martin would probably insist on being married in Church, and ask Roddy
to be his best man.
No. Poor Martin was not going to be able to save her. Perhaps, instead,
she was going to destroy him.
She went back to bed and tossed between her sheets till dawn.
6
Next morning Martin’s face of suppressed excitement shewed only too
clearly how deeply the web was tangled now.
She went with him after breakfast to visit his little farm.
There was something in the brown soft earth, in the dark warmth of byres
and stables, in the rich smell of animal breath and hay and soil
mingled, something in the many secret, silent heads lifting, snuffing,
reaching tentatively out, then tossing away from the outstretched hand;
especially something in the clear golden-brown eyes curiously greeting
you for a moment, then recoiling, relapsing into their animal aloofness:
something that painfully suggested Roddy. He was like animals, electric
and mysterious. The half-distrustful fleeting glance, the dark soft
glossy head, the appealing grace: these were attributes he had in common
with the farm dog, and the calves, the black kittens playing all over
the stables, the dark chestnut colt in the meadow.
There was no escape from him in all the world.
She said to herself, moving her lips:
‘Sick fancies. Sick fancies.’
If she could see Roddy as a natural human being, then only could she
hope to be free of him.
She climbed a slope and sat on a stile at the top, waiting for Martin
while he interviewed a farmer.
Below lay the house and garden she had elected to share with Martin all
her life: lovely, intricate patterns of roof and wall in the morning
sun; enchanting shapes of violet shadow spilt across the mellow brick;
charming lavender smoke spirals from the chimneys; exquisitely-ordered
paths and lawns, hedges and flower-beds; two cedar trees motionless in
their great planes of gloom on green brightness, green on gloom; and
beyond the fruitful walls, the enfolding patiently-productive land which
was Martin’s.
You would be thought lucky indeed to live here. Perhaps the land might
compensate, drug the mind and give it slow contented musings. Perhaps
you could escape from Martin and feel alone with it.... But no: with its
medium tints and mild companionable expression it was he himself. You
could never get away from Martin here.
As he came running up the hill, eagerly, like a cheerful dog, she
watched him coldly. With a faint distaste she observed his agile leap on
to the stile beside her.
‘Well?’ he burst out happily.
‘Well, Martin?’
‘What are you thinking of, looking so solemn?’
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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