Francis would need nourishment, and although he had not appeared ill,
it would be better for the doctor to be at hand in case the agitation
of the afternoon prevented him from sleeping, and some soothing draught
might be advisable. It was wisest to send for him. And she did not
know--indeed how could she?--that the doctor was at the moment watching
by a dying bed many miles away, and that her summons was destined not
to reach him before the next morning.
When the tray was brought she took it up-stairs herself. Francis was
lying on the sofa and did not look up as she entered.
"I have brought you some soup," she said; "I think you must need it."
He raised himself and thanked her courteously, and took the cup from
her hands. Philippa felt encouraged, for she had been half afraid lest
he should repulse her. She stood quietly beside him while he drank,
and then moved to set the tray on a table.
Having done so she returned, to find his eyes fixed on her, and he
watched her while she fetched a chair and sat down by the couch.
Then he asked very gently and kindly, "My dear, why did you do it?"
Philippa had answered this question when Isabella had asked it, and
answered it honestly--or so she had thought at the time, but she was
wiser now.
Looking at him bravely and without a tremor in her voice, for she was
determined to hold herself well in hand, "Because I loved you," she
said simply.
"Poor child! Poor child!"
He murmured the words almost inaudibly. Then after a moment's silence
he added, "I did not know--I did not know--I thought it was Phil.
There was so much I could not understand--I thought it was all part of
my weakness. Then, when we went to Bessmoor, the sight of it was so
familiar, and so many thoughts troubled me--but I had no doubt; and
then, in the afternoon when I was alone, I opened that drawer and
found--so many pictures--of--Phil. I will show you. Will you fetch
them?"
She did as he bade her, and came back to his side with a sheaf of
drawings.
"Look," he said, "I found all these. I suppose now that I did them in
the years that have gone by. But they puzzled me, because I thought
they must be my work, and there are so many--and yet--I could not
remember. Some are very like my little Phil. And the sight of them
seemed to stir my brain, and I wondered more and more. I thought that
you were Phil, and that they were of you--and yet---- Somehow there
was some one else I missed--a blank--so many blanks. I could not
understand, until to-day. Dear mother! What did she feel I wonder,
all those years? How dreadful for her! Did I know her?"
"I do not know. You did not often speak."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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