She spoke with sorrow of the fate of her parents; her mother, she
feared, would not long survive the shock.
The minister talked with her kindly and seriously, urging her to be
resigned to what had happened, whether merited or unmerited, and not to
let distress and anger tempt her to shut herself from the world. He
reminded her of the one honor that he had spoken of at her marriage; he
spoke pleasantly of her father, whose misfortune was due to a
miscalculation on his part, not to any intentional dishonesty.
"I have not forgotten your wedding day," pursued the minister, giving a
slight turn to the conversation, "and wished to bid you good morning on
this fifth anniversary of it."
Annele smiled and thanked him; but the thought struck to her heart that
Lenz had gone away without bidding her good morning. With a return of
her old fluency she expressed her pleasure at the honor her minister
paid her; spoke of his great goodness, and of the daily prayers the
whole village ought to offer up to Heaven for his life and health. She
evidently was bent upon keeping the conversation away from her own
affairs. She would allow no approach, on the minister's part, to the
subject of her domestic difficulties. Under the influence of that
determination she drew in her breath and moistened her lips, as the
postilion Gregory might when he was about to blow one of his elaborate
pieces on the horn.
The minister understood it all. He began by praising Annele for her
many good qualities,--for her neatness and careful management in her
parents' house, and her keeping her purity unharmed by the temptations
which assailed her there.
"I have long been unaccustomed to praise," answered Annele. "I had
almost forgotten I was ever of account in the world."
The minister saw his bait was taking. As a physician wins the
confidence of his patient by describing to him all his aches and pains,
till the sick man looks up joyfully and says, "the doctor knows my
whole case; he will surely help me," so the minister described to
Annele all her mental sufferings, and wound up with saying: "You have
often seen blood flow from a wound, from a blow or a bruise, and know
how the black blood gradually takes on all the seven colors. So it is
with the soul's wounds. An injury, an offence, like that black blood
gradually takes on all the colors,--hate, contempt, anger, self-pity,
pain at the wrong, a desire to return evil for evil, and again to let
all go to wreck and ruin."
It seemed to Annele that she was holding her heart in her hand, and
showing how it had been bruised and lacerated and beaten to pieces. The
good-for-nothing barrelmaker, he would have his full deserts now! "O,
help me, sir!" she cried.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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