"One of the first and most indispensable laws, is not to reproach or even recall to the mind of recipients one's kindnesses. The tacit agreement between the giver and the receiver is, that the one should immediately forget what he has given, and that the other should never forget what he has received. The frequent mention of kindnesses is a crushing weight to the soul." 6. Benevolence consists sometimes in refusing. "If the thing asked for is prejudicial to him who asks for it, then benevolence consists no longer in giving, but in refusing. We should have more regard to the interests of the petitioner than to his wishes. As we refuse patients cold water, arms to angry persons, so should we also refuse a kindness to the most pressing requests, if that kindness is injurious to the interested person.... One should no less consider the end than the principle of kindnesses." 7. Benevolence must be disinterested. "It is shameful to do good for any other motive than doing good. If one gave only in the hope of restitution, one would choose the richest in preference to the most worthy.... The least benevolent men would be those who had the best means for being benevolent: the rich, the great, the king, etc. ... As an insult is a thing one should for itself avoid, so benevolence is desirable for its own sake (xv.).... There is no benevolence where there is expectation of profit. I shall give so much; I shall receive so much: this is called a bargain." (xiv.) We will put aside the other questions, more curious than useful, raised by Seneca (as, for example, whether one should give to the wicked; whether one may be his own benefactor; whether one may allow himself to be outdone by good deeds, etc.), and consider now the duties of the one under obligation. =68. Duties of the person under obligation.=--_Gratitude._--After having expounded the duties of the benefactor, we have to ask ourselves what are those of the person under obligation. The principle of all is _gratitude_; that only comes after the kindness; but there are duties which precede the good deed or accompany it. We shall again cite here Seneca as authority. After having set forth the principles which should actuate the giver, he also sets forth those the receiver should be guided by. 1. The first principle is that we should not be too greedy and receive from any one, but only from those to whom we should like to give ourselves: