So like an arrow swift he flew, Shot by an archer strong; So did he fly--which brings me to The middle of my song. Away went Gilpin, out of breath, And sore against his will, Till, at his friend the calender's, His horse at last stood still. The calender, amazed to see His neighbor in such trim, Laid down his pipe, flew to the gate, And thus accosted him: "What news? what news? your tidings tell; Tell me you must and shall; Say why bareheaded you are come, Or why you come at all?" Now Gilpin had a pleasant wit, And loved a timely joke; And thus unto the calender, In merry guise, he spoke: "I came because your horse would come; And, if I well forbode, My hat and wig will soon be here:-- They are upon the road." The calender, right glad to find His friend in merry pin, Returned him not a single word, But to the house went in; Whence straight he came with hat and wig; A wig that flowed behind, A hat not much the worse for wear, Each comely in its kind. He held them up and in his turn Thus showed his ready wit: "My head is twice as big as yours, They, therefore, needs must fit. But let me scrape the dirt away That hangs upon your face; And stop and eat, for well you may Be in a hungry case." Said John, "It is my wedding day, And all the world would stare, If wife should dine at Edmonton And I should dine at Ware." So, turning to his horse, he said, "I am in haste to dine; 'Twas for your pleasure you came here, You shall go back for mine." Ah! luckless speech and bootless boast, For which he paid full dear; For while he spake, a braying ass Did sing most loud and clear; Whereat his horse did snort, as he Had heard a lion roar, And galloped off with all his might, As he had done before. Away went Gilpin, and away Went Gilpin's hat and wig: He lost them sooner than at first; For why?--they were too big. Now Mistress Gilpin, when she saw Her husband posting down Into the country far away, She pulled out half a crown; And thus unto the youth she said, That drove them to the Bell, "This shall be yours when you bring back My husband safe and well." The youth did ride, and soon did meet John coming back amain; Whom in a trice he tried to stop By catching at his rein; But not performing what he meant And gladly would have done, The frightened steed he frighted more, And made him faster run. Away went Gilpin, and away Went postboy at his heels, The postboy's horse right glad to miss The lumbering of the wheels. Six gentlemen upon the road, Thus seeing Gilpin fly, With postboy scampering in the rear, They raised the hue and cry;-- "Stop thief! stop thief! a highwayman!" Not one of them was mute; And all and each that passed that way Did join in the pursuit.