And with that she put down the candle she was carrying and, seating
herself on a cask, began to cry. And she cried and cried and cried.
Now, upstairs, they began to wonder why she was so long drawing the
cider; so after a time her mother went down to the cellar to see what
had come to her, and found her, seated on the cask, crying ever so hard,
and the cider running all over the floor.
"Lawks a mercy me!" cried her mother, "whatever is the matter?"
"O mother!" says she between her sobs, "it's that horrid mallet.
Supposing him and me was married, and supposing we was to have a son,
and supposing he was to grow up to be a man, and supposing he was to
come down to draw cider like as I'm doing, and supposing the mallet were
to fall on his head and kill him, how dreadful it would be!"
"Dear heart!" said the mother, seating herself beside her daughter and
beginning to cry: "How dreadful it would be!"
So they both sat a-crying.
Now after a time, when they did not come back, the farmer began to
wonder what had happened, and going down to the cellar found them
seated side by side on the cask, crying hard, and the cider running all
over the floor.
"Zounds!" says he, "whatever is the matter?"
"Just look at that horrid mallet up there, father," moaned the mother.
"Supposing our daughter was to marry her sweetheart, and supposing they
was to have a son, and supposing he was to grow to man's estate, and
supposing he was to come down to draw cider like as we're doing, and
supposing that there mallet was to fall on his head and kill him, how
dreadful it would be!"
"Dreadful indeed!" said the father and, seating himself beside his wife
and daughter, started a-crying too.
Now upstairs the young squire wanted his supper; so at last he lost
patience and went down into the cellar to see for himself what they were
all after. And there he found them seated side by side on the cask
a-crying, with their feet all a-wash in cider, for the floor was fair
flooded. So the first thing he did was to run straight and turn off the
tap. Then he said:
"What are you three after, sitting there crying like babies, and letting
good cider run over the floor?"
Then they all three began with one voice, "Look at that horrid mallet!
Supposing you and me/she was married, and supposing we/you had a
son, and supposing he was to grow to man's estate, and supposing he was
to come down here to draw cider like as we be, and supposing that there
mallet was to fall down on his head and kill him, how dreadful it would
be!"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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