"I'm happy," he whispered. "I talk like a fool because I feel like one.
Heedless. Irresponsible. You've given me something and I can only look
at it almost without thought."
"It seems so strange that you should love me," she answered. "Because
I've loved you always and never dreamed of you loving." She had become
melting, as if her sadness were dissolving into caresses. "Let's just
walk and I'll remember we're together and be happy, too."
Thoughts vanished from him. He released her hand and they walked in
silence with their arms together. A sleep descended. Their faces,
tranquil and lighted by the snow, offered solitudes to each other.
It was now snowing heavily. A thick white lattice raised itself from the
streets against the darkness. The little black hectagonals of night
danced between its spaces. Long white curtains painted themselves on the
shadows of the city. The lovers walked unaware of the street. The snow
crowded gently about them, moving patiently like a white and silent
dream over their heads. Phantom houses stared after them. Slanting
rooftops spread wings of silver in the night and drifted toward the
moon. The half-closed leaden eyes of windows watched from another world.
The snow grew heavier, winding itself about the yellow lights of street
lamps and crawling with sudden life through the blur of window rays.
Beneath, the pavements opened like white and narrow fans in a far-away
hand. Black figures leaning forward emerged for an instant from behind
the falling snow and disappeared again.
Still the lovers moved without words--two black figures themselves, arms
together, leaning forward, staring with burning hearts and tranquil
faces out of a dream, as if they did not exist, had never existed; as if
in the snow and night they had become an unreality, walking deeper into
mists--yet never quite vanishing but growing only more unreal. Snow and
two lovers walking together with the world like a dream over their
heads, with life lingering in their eyes like a delicately absent-minded
guest--the thought drifted like a memory through their hearts.
Then slowly consciousness of themselves returned, bringing with it no
relief of words. Their hearts seemed to have grown weak with tears, and
in their minds existed nothing but the dark vagueness of despair--the
despair of things that die with their eyes open and questing. Faces
drifting like circles of light in the storm. At the end of the street a
park. Here they would vanish from each other. The snow would continue
falling gently, patiently, upon an empty world.
The cold of Rachel's fingers pressed upon his hand. Her face turned
itself to him. A moment of happiness halted them both as if they had
been embraced. A wonder--the why and where of her leaving. But an
indifference deprived him of words.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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