Ernest Linwood; or, The Inner Life of the AuthorHentz, Caroline Lee
General
Ernest Linwood; or, The Inner Life of the Author
Hentz, Caroline Lee
Fiction
We retired very early in our secluded, quiet home. We had no evening
visitors to charm away the sober hours, and time marked by the sands of
the hour-glass always seems to glide more slowly. That solemn-looking
hour-glass! How I used to gaze on each dropping particle, watching the
upward segment gradually becoming more and more transparent, and the
lower as gradually darkening. It was one of Peggy's inherited treasures,
and she reverenced it next to her Bible. The glass had been broken and
mended with putty, which formed a dark, diagonal line across the
venerable crystal. This antique chronometer occupied the central place
on the mantel-piece, its gliding sands, though voiceless, for ever
whispering of ebbing time and everlasting peace. "Passing away, passing
away," seemed continually issuing from each meeting cone. I have no
doubt the contemplation of this ancient, solemn instrument, which old
Father Time is always represented as grasping in one unclenching hand,
while he brandishes in the other the merciless scythe, had a lasting
influence on my character.
That night, it was long before I fell asleep. I lay awake thinking of
the morning's dawn. The starlight abroad, that came in through the upper
part of the windows, glimmered on the dark frame and glassy surface of
the old timepiece, which stood out in bold relief from the whitewashed
wall behind it. Before I knew it, I was composing a poem on that old
hour-glass. It was a hoary pilgrim, travelling on a lone and sea-beat
shore, towards a dim and distant goal, and the print of his footsteps on
the wave-washed sands, guided others in the same lengthening journey.
The scene was before me. I saw the ancient traveller, his white locks
streaming in the ocean blast; I heard the deep murmur of the restless
tide; I saw the footsteps; and they looked like sinking graves; when all
at once, in the midst of my solemn inspiration, a stern mocking face
came between me and the starlight night, the jeering voice of my master
was in my ears, a dishonored fragment was fluttering in my hand. The
vision fled; I turned my head on my pillow and wept.
You may say such thoughts and visions were strangely precocious in a
child of twelve years old. I suppose they were; but I never remember
being a child. My sad, gentle mother, the sober, earnest, practical
Peggy, were the companions of my infancy, instead of children of my own
age. The sunlight of my young life was not reflected from the golden
locks of childhood, its radiant smile and unclouded eye. I was defrauded
of the sweetest boon of that early season, a confidence that this world
is the happiest, fairest, best of worlds, the residence of joy, beauty,
and goodness.
A thoughtful child! I do not like to hear it. What has a little child to
do with thought? That sad, though glorious reversion of our riper and
darker years?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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